The yardstick : How would a Tunisian man conduct a relationship with a Tunisian woman?

The minority of Muslims yes for sure but not the minority in this country who grow beards ! as I keep saying they have done it to demonstrate outwardly their beliefs that they are believing Fundamentally ! I`ll continue to listen to my Muslim friends who come from totally different backgrounds and also all other sources.

I never said anyone would be offended?!?!?!

And yes, i do see that.... my point was this thread was supposed to be a basic thread regarding what the rats say in the sense of " ............ but its ok because you're not tunisian" .....

And also IF a more fundamental tunisia appears ... we are discussing now....

This answer to initial title of thread is that it may change.....

I was just telling about REAL FACTS that happened to me in Tunisia. Now, if you want to keep your heads in the sand, never mind, go ahead I would say.

I agree with this completley, its obvious the family have hidden agenda's if they are allowing you to stay in the family home out of wedlock, islamically it is haraam. My parents would never accept it but then again they're good, decent people that don't con money out of innocent women!

Thats cus they've got only money on the mind and in their world money conquers all, even religion!

I agree with you, but some just curious questions really. Sleeping together when 1 person has Tunisian nationality, this is not enforced in Tunisia at all. Also a Tunisian university student told me that asking friends for money is acceptable even asking female friends is the modern way in Tunisia? not sure if this is true or not what do you think?

As DZ knows i have an adopted tunisian brother who would rather do without than ask anyone outside of his family for money, he finds it totally unacceptable for any man to ask a woman for money and hates the rats and what they do

Yes I agree, thinking about it I can't really imagine any of the European men that I know, work colleagues or just guys I know actually having the nerve to ask a woman for money, maybe and just a maybe a very short term loan for example "I'll give you the taxi money back tomorrow"..and of course they will with no doubt and probably a box of chocolates or some flowers as a little thanks for helping out.

Sorry English is not my first language, but enforced is meaning by law isn't it?
Because it's by law forbidden here in Tunisia, that is why they can go to prison, otherwise that wouldn't be possible aswell.
But I'm 100% sure that it's forbidden by law, the person who told you it's not, he is lying, because every Tunisian person knows that.

And asking a woman for money, doesn't matter which Nationality, it's totally not done!

Yes so I understand it is forbidden by law but it happens all the time even in the well known hotels. Yes asking a woman for money is totally not done in any nationality i agree.

Yes, it happens in the hotels, the hotels are breaking the law. If the police decide to raid the hotels, then you pay for the consequences, simple. Since the revolution a lot of hotels have changed their policies, and will not book unmarried couples, where one person is Tunisian into a double room. I don't know how often, or how many hotels get raided, but it does happen.

Like Marilyna already did wright, hotels did change after the Revolution. Because not only the Tunisian person will go to prison, but also the hotel has to pay a lot of money and will loose license after 3 times I think it was, they will not take that risc offcourse.

And because it happends, will not say that it's allowed by law. For excample I cross sometimes the street when the lights are red, I see a lot of other people doing that....but it's still forbidden by law

Here in Tunisia there are also a lot of things which are not forbidden by law, but you don't do that, when you have respect for your girlfriend and your family. You see here in the tourist places for excample mixed couples walking hand in hand, kissing in public or at the airport kissing hello and goodbeye, that is here so not done and when they do, you immidiatly you know he doesn't respect his girlfriend, just want something else than love.......
If they really respect you as a girlfriend they will explain to you that they will not kiss and hug you at the airport where everyone can see it.

Personally I don't mind at all waiting at the airport, watching what is going on, it's like a movie only without popcorn! LOL
When my husband is with me, than it's double fun for me (LOL not for my husband), because with a little bit time he's getting annoyed about the "rats" who are kissing and hugging at the airport and there are allways other Tunisian people who speak about it, so they are talking a little bit together why it's not done and not respectfull.
Sometimes the "rat" will say something because he knows, he feels that they are speaking about him and when the "rat" say something he mostly say it to my husband because he has got a European woman with him aswell, so the "rat" will think my husband is the same and ask than things like do you already have the visa papers? Than.....my husband get more annoyed! LOL

One of the things I love about Tunisia - I hate all that kissing and cuddling in public that people do in Europe - yeuck

Dont think I would be comfortable with kissing in public in England let alone in a muslim country. Me and my rat never showed affection towards each other in public out of respect. I know its not really the done thing over there.

I'm the same! It's too much for me and I don't like public displays of affection between boyfriends and girlfriends here either so would not want it there.

Me and my friends at home will greet and say goodbye to each other with a hug, we've always done that because it's normal for us however, as we regularly stay at the same hotel in Hammamet and the staff remember us they try to say hello with a hug and it makes me feel awkward....that's without them trying to get in my pants as well!!

I have a friend that isn't in a touristy area nor works there and when we meet for coffee he simply does the kiss on either side thing with no touching.....not sure what the "rules" are around males and females doing this but I'm just overly glad he isn't trying to bear hug me (plus he pays for his own coffee hahahah)

So maybe Netniet you could shed a light on this.....would you say it is simply rats/workers in tourist areas that do this and no one else?? I mean towards friends and girlfriends

Tunisian couples, married or not, will not hugg or kiss or hand in hand with eachother in public.
Tunisian man and woman young and old, who are just friends will not hugg, mostly also not kiss but some elder people do so when they are very close, but mostly only family and even than it depends per family and how close the persons are.
Tunisian female friends will kiss eachother but mostly at 1 cheek. Tunisian male friends will kiss sometimes when they are good friends and didn't see eachother for a long time.

For excample I live in a place who has tourist aswell, but I live outside tourist area, but there are more European people living here in this neighbourhood aswell.
On time there was a European couple who came to live here and went swimming in the sea, they were giving eachother a kiss and everyone talked about that, that they should know that if they were living here between Tunisian people that you better not do that.
For me it's offcourse nothing, but here it's an issue and woman and woman kiss (at one cheek is more common) and man with man who they didn't see for a long time aswell.it will not help that they respect you and accept you.

Personally I don't have a problem with this kind of things and respect it and will never do it.
Sometimes it will bring me even back to my teenage years when I had a boyfriend and kissing when no other person could see it! LOL
For excample with Ramadan, we allways eat with the family, when we leave there at the way to the street in the dark, than I say to my husband ok kiss me so my Ramadan is also ended today! LOL

Just as I thought really...that doesn't bother me either and I see what you mean about it reminding you of when you were a teenager I don't like it anyways....I wouldn't kiss a boyfriend in public here....or even in front of friends here but that's just my personal thing really.

"Tunisian man and woman young and old, who are just friends will not hugg, mostly also not kiss but some elder people do so when they are very close, but mostly only family and even than it depends per family and how close the persons are." - so your saying that if a Tunisian man and a Tunisian woman are very good friends then sometimes they might do the kiss on the cheek thing but it still isn't very common.

I was told the following; women to women, friends kiss both cheeks. Closest friends and relatives, kiss twice on both cheeks. Woman to man, I kiss my dear friends close relatives the same as I would her BUT they generally have asked her for my permission first. My husband not Tunisian, so the same for him as me. Male friends also will kiss me on both cheeks IF they are her close friends and have checked with her first. Male acquaintances always check even before shaking hands. Any other contact is out of order.

Thanks That's fine then....I like to keep with normal customs when visiting a country and generally the most I find acceptable myself from Tunisians is a wee handshake and that's it....maybe not the norm exactly but I suppose it's a halfway mark loool

Where I live in Tunisia most of the large families live together. Each couple of the married sons does have their own house around the same yard. The women cook together and the families eat and spend evenings all together BUT when it's bedtime it still is NOT done that a son and his wife leave at the same time...they leave each apart with a symbolical quarter of an hour difference...just to explain you how any reference to sleeping together is avoided!
Can you imagine what a huge gap between this behaviour and some rat families accepting a son bringing a european victim to stay the night over...

When I travel to Europe alone, my husband brings me to the airport and we say already goodbye with a kiss in the car before getting into the airport, same thing when coming back, no hugs nor kisses in the airport hall before the eyes of all to see...

Doing fine Zest because you have taken the time to ask! I get on just fine everywhere for just the same reason