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Discussion in 'Online Rats' started by mischief, Oct 13, 2011.

  1. lozza

    lozza Well-Known Member

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    Hi michelle and welcome, why don't you take a step back and read some of the stories on here and this will make you more aware of what some of these men or boys are capable off. You only have to log into FB and they all come crawling out of the sewer they are in. They all say the same things and fill you full of false hope and promises. I hope you don't get hurt by this man just be very careful. Why don't you name him hun and see if anything comes up about him, google his name and see if he is on other dating sites as a lot of them are. Does he work? Where does he live? You never know someone might know him. Take care. :)
     
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  2. lozza

    lozza Well-Known Member

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    Also talking marriage to someone you have never met is not normal is it. :eek:
     
  3. Laurence

    Laurence Well-Known Member

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    Michelle, this man is a rat, no doubt about that. Just google around and you'll find him on several dating sites, to them it's like a job. Nobody right in his mind will ask a woman they've never met to get married. He's in for the visa and the life out of Tunisia. He told you so, because if not why on earth woulmd he want to change tourism visa into "staying and building a life abroad"????
    Don't be naive, get rid of the man.
     
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  4. tigerlil

    tigerlil Moderator Staff Member

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    Hi Michelle welcome to TLR, this place may just save you a load of heartache!! The endgame for this guy is to get to your country. You are being groomed by a visa rat!!
    The family will have a whip round to fund the visa dont worry about that, as they will see it as benefiting them also..Like Lozza said please spend sometime reading other ladies experiences, learn about the Beznezz!!!!
     
  5. michellle

    michellle New Member

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    He is not working right now because he is going school there. I do not want to post his name on here but I have googled his name and didn't find him on any other dating sites. And I searched for his name on here and found nothing.
     
  6. NetNiet

    NetNiet EVIL member :D

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    Hi Michelle I think you did great by searching on the internet about your situation.
    I have to admit that an age cap in combination with liking the attention he's giving you, is something that Tunisian men are great at to find, because that will give them more chance when they are looking for something more than love, like money or visa.
    And sorry to be direct, if he was looking for love, he would have a look around him in his real life, because you prefer to have your love relationship in your daily real life, than you prefer it online.

    By reading what you're writing here, I have to say that I really think he is after a visa, I'm sorry

    This is one part that gets my Alarm Bells to rinkle that he wants a visa.
    He's not talking about you coming over to Tunisia to get to know eachother because you're the love of his life, no his programm is getting over to you....so that is the Visa!
    I'm not sure how it is for the UK, but in Holland we have 2 ways to get a visitors visa, 1 with a person is guaranty for the financial expensis and one without and than the Tunisian man has to proof he has the money, something about 34 euro per day.
    But you know he can show you the money, but maybe it's money from someone else, so when he arrives without money what are you going to do?
    And are you OK with him to stay at your house the first time you meet him?
    Why don't you go to Tunisia to visit him and see how he is in real life?

    Well that is Alarm Bell 2 for me! Why talking about getting married when you don't have meet in person in real life??? Little bit strange isn't it? When a man from your own country who you did meet online, would have said this? What would you have think? Maybe that he is a little bit creepy....?

    Here you have one of my other Alarm Bells, because you mayne not know how a visa works, but believe me, every Tunisian man knows.
    So my Alarm Bell is know he wants to go to your country and he's not planning to leave, might even stay illegaly there.
    Because with a visitor visa he's not allowed to work.
    Because with a visitor's visa he has to return to Tunisia at the end of the visa date.
    So the risc that he will stay is there and than he will be illegaly in your country and in one or the other way you will be responsible.....think about that!

    Well why don't you tell him that you're coming to Tunisia! (even if you don't intend to do so, have a look how he will rspond to that)
    Does he have a job so he can support you and your child by living there?
    Does he has a house where you can live?
    And if not, ask him how he is going to solve that problem them and make him responsible to do something about being able to take care of you and your child.


    It's allways good to give information because than we can respond, but be also carefull allways about private information because it's for everyone to see what you write here!

    Take care and please go visit to visit him and Tunisia several times before you make hughe steps in your life!
     
  7. NetNiet

    NetNiet EVIL member :D

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    Hi Michelle, so if he's studying how will he be able to take care of you and your child when you're going to live in Tunisia?

    And my experience is that I'm pretty good at searching but there are here experts with searching at the internet also in other languages websites and the datingsites, so you maybe have to think about it to say his name here or by PM to a member here so they can help you.
    There have been many women like you who said I searched and nothing find and after they put the name up here, there came loads and loads of information ....and other girlfriends.....protect yourself for that you get more involved and you end up like that!
    And hope that there is indeed nothing to find, but I'm afraid by your story there will be now or later on.

    Take care of yourself and your child, you did had problaly Alarm Bells yourself otherwise you wouldn't have come here and after that also did write here and ask for opinions.
    So if you don't want to mention it here in this topic, what will give you much more information, than ask someone in PM to help you
     
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  8. michellle

    michellle New Member

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    Take care and please go visit to visit him and Tunisia several times before you make hughe steps in your life![/quote]

    I actually live in the US and he wanted me to come there first but because of my school and my son. I told him I could not leave the US for a while. He was willing to pay for the flight for me and my son and said we could say at his house. I would much rather him come here to visit first then go to a country I don't know with my 10 year old son. He actually has asked me several times if it was possible for me to come there because he wants me to meet his family. And he knows about the visa laws and knows he would not be able to work on a visitor visa but is talking about trying to find a job here that will hire him and then going back home to get his work visa.
     
  9. tigerlil

    tigerlil Moderator Staff Member

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    I actually live in the US and he wanted me to come there first but because of my school and my son. I told him I could not leave the US for a while. He was willing to pay for the flight for me and my son and said we could say at his house. I would much rather him come here to visit first then go to a country I don't know with my 10 year old son. He actually has asked me several times if it was possible for me to come there because he wants me to meet his family. And he knows about the visa laws and knows he would not be able to work on a visitor visa but is talking about trying to find a job here that will hire him and then going back home to get his work visa.[/quote]



    Michelle do you know this is going on everyday online..i could go on my facebook now and open it up so anyone can make contact and i will be getting plenty of foreign men showing an interest in me, and probs a few marraige proposals before the week end...There is nothing new in what you are telling us, eveything he said we have already heard here...Again im telling you its all about him getting out of his country and you are the bridge!!!
     
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  10. NetNiet

    NetNiet EVIL member :D

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    So you're going to school aswell?
    But don't you have school holidays?

    You know the fact that here in Tunisia we can't send money out of Tunisia only when you hav a special bankaccount which only European people have here?
    So how will he send you the money?
    Is it his house or from his family?

    This seems to me not logical, you pretend to be responsible as a mother for your son and say you're more scared to take him with you at a holiday than you take a man in your house which you never meet in person? In your house where your child is living?
    A Tunisian man which wants to stay in the USA so will cost you a lot of money, because you will be responsible for him?
    Seems to me you're acting more like a mother to your Tunisian boyfriend than for your own son!

    LOL you want to tell me that it's sooooo easy to find a job in the USA?
    To get a job where he can work illegaly?
    Or that a USA company will say yes we don't know you, we don't know if you're brilliant working but hey please go back to Tunisia and get the right visa so you can work for us, because we really need you, we can't find better cleaners or pizza bakers than you so we will wait for you and we realise that kind of visa can take months and months to get, but we will wait.....LOL
    Please keep on dreaming! ;)
     
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  11. marilyna

    marilyna Chocolate Connoisseur

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    Normal for Tunisian rats.
     
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  12. marilyna

    marilyna Chocolate Connoisseur

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    Welcome to TLR Michelle,

    I agree with what the other members have said, this man does not sound genuine. Telling you that you are his life, is one of their classic lines. Please read the rat quotes post, on the rat behaviour section of this site.

    You are right to be concerned, he has put his cards on the table and told you he wants a visitors visa, and once he gets that he wants to change that once he arrives. He has it all set out, as well as letting you know that he wants to marry you. The marriage proposal is too soon, this is what rats do.
     
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  13. marilyna

    marilyna Chocolate Connoisseur

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    Are you sure you know his real name. These men have multiple identities. They may not use their real names on other sites. My rat had two Facebook accounts, and was on Tagged. The names were different on different sites.

    The fact that you cannot find him on the internet, does not mean he is not a rat. If you go on the site

    http://pipl.com/

    input any information you have on him. Different nicknames etc.

    You have to feel comfortable about posting his name, but on the other hand, if someone knows him, they won't come forward until they see the name, remember that. Maybe you can say a bit more, where does he live in Tunisia?
     
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  14. marilyna

    marilyna Chocolate Connoisseur

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    I actually live in the US and he wanted me to come there first but because of my school and my son. I told him I could not leave the US for a while. He was willing to pay for the flight for me and my son and said we could say at his house. I would much rather him come here to visit first then go to a country I don't know with my 10 year old son. He actually has asked me several times if it was possible for me to come there because he wants me to meet his family. And he knows about the visa laws and knows he would not be able to work on a visitor visa but is talking about trying to find a job here that will hire him and then going back home to get his work visa.[/quote]
    He probably has figured you will not go to Tunisia, so that is why he said he would pay the flight for you to go there. I doubt it will be easy for him to get a visitors visa to the US, if he is not working at the moment. As Netniet pointed out, if he does get into the US, he is your responsibility once he is on US soil, if he chooses not to return to Tunisia, and overstays his visa. You don't know this man, despite the contact you have had with him online. I think if you want to take this forward, you need to go to Tunisia, to see him on home ground first.
     
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  15. Ariel

    Ariel Under the Sea Staff Member

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    You need Dasa - if anyone can sniff out a rat online, it's her! :D
     
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  16. michellle

    michellle New Member

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    I am sorry but I feel it would be safer to have him come here where I have my family and friends then for me to go to a country where he is the only one I know. Also I am not saying he is not a rat but he is not like the typical stories I have read. His family is well off and he never really talks about how much he hates it there or how much he wants to leave. In fact he tells me he wants to go back at some point. He never asks me for money and he uses his dime to call me and it started out just as friends and just escalated from there. I know I said before we had been talking for several months and that probablly seems like i just meant a few but we have been talking for over 6 months and we talk on average for 3-4 hours a day on webcam and talk on the phone and when we aren't on webcam or talking on the phone we are messaging each-other constantly. I have talked to a few of his brothers online as well just to be introduced and he has shown me many pictures of him hanging out with his family and friends.
     
  17. Laurence

    Laurence Well-Known Member

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    OK Michelle, looks as if you're already on his hook my dear...you are virtually in love and yours is not like the others...
    We heard this so many times before!
    So you are willing to help him to come to the USA...this implicates that you are going to be responsible for him all the way...even if he dissappears from your environment once he's got the visa! Think about that. If he gets ill, if he wanders off, if he turns out to be no good...you'll be responsible!
    Your story is a typical RAT story, sorry to say so. Now if you don't want to see the truth (love gives pink glasses) up to you, you asked our opinion, we gave it...you have been warned.
    Still this : we noticed recently that the rats are concentrating their tricks on US women, as the European ones are starting to be to well informed about rattery...US women are still gullible and naive in the rattery field.
     
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  18. NetNiet

    NetNiet EVIL member :D

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    Hi Michelle, it's correct that you're not saying he's a "rat", but what we try to say and some say it directly, that he has and did a lot of things what is typical like that.
    I understand you don't want to hear it because you're in love.
    But please don't forget that we've seen and heard it problaly more than you, a lot even do have experience to be in a situation like that.
    And please don't forget that you came here, it must have been a reason that you did it, maybe you heard an Alarm Bell, maybe you feel that something is maybe wrong, but you can't define it as a Alarm Bell....yet.

    And as a mother you have to think about what you're going to do.
    So because he did say he has the money to pay for everything, don't sign or fill in any paper that you are responsible for him.
    Because I can pretty much assure you that he will not go back and stay illegaly in the USA and if he needs doctor treatment, you will have to pay for it, you even don't want to think about that he need an operation or stay in the hospital, because you will be paying for that the rest of your life....problaly while you were thinkin why didn't I take a holiday to Tunisia with my child!
    And it costs also a lot of money ehwn he get caught at one moment and they return him to Tunisia, you will be paying that aswell.
    I think it's now 5 years that you're responsible for him if he stays longer than demanded for, including all kind of costs, when HE made de decision not to go back, he can destroy your life....that is the decision which you have to make now!
    You've been warned and this is even not the whole information, so please take your responsibility to have a look in the visa law at both sides, USA side and Tunisia side!
     
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  19. michellle

    michellle New Member

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    He does have his own money and how will I be responsible for him, he is just telling them he is coming on holiday not to visit a specific person. Then he knows he will have to go back. I already told him I will not marry him for at least a few years and he has said he doesn't care if we marry or not. He has not really set off any Alarm Bells the reason I came on here is my cousin wanted me to get advise. Ok so maybe he is a rat but isn't there a chance he isn't too. My family knows everything and to be honest they are supportive of the realtionship. But they all think it is safer for him to come here then for me to drag my son to a strange country where i will know no one.
     
  20. NetNiet

    NetNiet EVIL member :D

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    Are you aware of that they can't here just go on holiday like we can?
    Do you have any idea how a visa works?

    1. All the things are guaranted by the person who invites him.
    You will have to sign for that, you will be rsponsible for I think it's 5 years, also when the invitation is only for 2 weeks.
    All your information is going in the system and will stay there aswell for 5 years

    2. He financial takes care, he needs a specific amount per day cash to show, for Holland it's 34 euro per day.
    If you're not staying with family or friends, than you need to handover a hotel reservation, paid for offcourse
    If he's staying by family or friends, than they need to hand over an invitation letter where you agree which period he will be sleeping in your house and if you provide him dinner etc.

    And 1 thing I can assure you no Tunisian men will get a visa by saying I want to go on holiday to Europe.
    There will be needed a specific and good reason and you're the one who must provide that to him, otherwise he will not get a visa.

    And I have to say that I personally hope no embassy from any country will provide a visa when people only have meet online.
    I think if they're going to do that, the problem will only become bigger and bigger.
     
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  21. michellle

    michellle New Member

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    so from what i have been able to tell i can send him a letter of invite for him to stay with me but that is different from sponsering him so i would not be financially responsible for him.
     
  22. NetNiet

    NetNiet EVIL member :D

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    Well you have to check this yourself in what way you will be responsible for the USA and Tunisia when you invite him.
    I'm sorry I don't know the laws from each country, so you have to check that out and also check if they're coming changes and when that will be.
     
  23. Laurence

    Laurence Well-Known Member

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    Michelle, a simple invitation letter won't do! He will have to get a visa at the US Embassy in Tunis in order to be able to leave the country and to enter the US. BUT this visa will never ever been given to him without YOU being responsible (financially and in all other fields) for him! He will have to pass an interview at the Embassy in Tunis, they will ask him what are his ties with you and why he is wanting to visit you...the chances of him getting a visa are very uncertain, unless you and your family are fully responsible AND unless he will be coming on a fiancée's visa...I BET HE KNOWS ALL THIS BETTER THAN YOU DO !!!
    Read http://tunisia.usembassy.gov/non-immigrant_visas.html

    Sorry, but you sound very very much in love with this student who wants a visa to the US on whatever condition...

    You think that the fact that YOU are not going to visit him is a guarantee???? Let me tell you that you are only skipping one stade in the process, which shows him that you are really a good "catch" : normally they ask you to visit them in order to get the victim totally under their spell...in your case no worries, this stade is already becoming unnecessary...saves him a lot of small expenses he would have been obliged to do on your behalf (housing and entertainment at his place)...
    My dear, YOU ARE THE IDEAL RAT VICTIM !!!! Sorry to wake you up from your sweet but so unrealistic loverdream.
     
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  24. dasa

    dasa Active Member

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    hi @all,

    sorry but last weeks im arround the world ;) Dubai, london, swiss and germany...........

    But now im back home...

    he invite you???? in his house?????????? no way

    and this guy is a rat. point................
     
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  25. hotdog

    hotdog New Member

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    i am very new
    i have just joined this site,and i can understand u not wanting to go to tunisia with your young son,but i have to tell u i met a young man from tunisia when i was on holiday this time last year,and i can tell u i have never given him money he is desbrite to come to this country,he has tried every trick in the book to get me to marry him its not going to happen,im a lot older than him ,and thank god i have a little sence and dignity left but this guy is one big big rat,they are very very very cunning and know how to groom i didnot know i was being groomed till i came on this siteand believe me this guy has every single one of these rat behavour,i read last nite about a girl who was very badly beatenfrom her so called boyfriend ,i urge u please please be very careful these woman on this site do know what they are talking about ,pleasefor ur little boys sake be careful i sincerly hope ur man is a good one ,but please thing about ur little boy if u bring this stranger into ur home u dont know what he is capable ofplease take care i hope everything works out for u TO THINE OWN SELF BE TRUE
     
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