How can I get rid of a Kairouan rat???

Kenji

Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2018
Messages
20
Hello Kenji, even it looks like chaos you’re actually moving forward, out for good from him and his fake world. It’s normal you feel angry, thankfully you do not feel love wich guarantees you can’t be pulled back. Certainly best advice is no contact, was wondering if you need to investigate something if your soon to be sister in law could help, if he already divorced you or the proper procedure for you to follow avoiding the most to see the rat again. Xx
She would help me.. I was still begging for divorce this week so it is too soon and he will have hope and it will take a while for him to realise. I truly have no love, not for a long time. The feeling was I was stuck with this leech and I was afraid to block as I wanted to know where he was for divorce but now I know I do not need to be in contact to find out if I am divorced.
 

Kenji

Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2018
Messages
20
hi, your situation sounds so much like mine was, i knew when i was going through the marriage i shouldn't be doing it,but felt so pressured, ended up paying for everything, the price for everything was always doubled...i have been trying to break free from him for about 2 years now, its hard believe me.... he has applied for a divorce twice and twice he has cancelled, he's still trying to get his visa, i have blocked him but he still finds a way to get to me, please please be strong and protect your assets, these rats are ruthless and will stop at nothing to get what they want.... many times i felt i was going to fall back into the trap, but i come on TLR and read and read and read till i get my strength back....this site is an absolute god send xxxx please be strong
Yes, I did not realise a sheep was so expensive!! I have no love for him and now I understand more about divorce I will never unblock him! They cannot get a visa if we do not sponsor them can they?
 

Kenji

Member
Joined
Oct 7, 2018
Messages
20
I paid for my wedding rings the wedding Every thing. I was told 10 min before we got married.
I was crying I didn't want to get married he came to me said not now all my family and friends are here. In a strange country alone is quite scary how can you run.
I am so sorry this happened to you. I know this feeling and when you are alone you have no options left. I cried during and after signing and you cannot run you are like a lamb to the slaughter. I have argues with him so much about him thinking I am a bank, he says he is poor, I said no, you are greedy! If you think I will work hard and have to pay for you for the rest of my life think again!
 

Laura2014

Staff Member/Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Nov 10, 2014
Messages
3,909
Yes, I did not realise a sheep was so expensive!! I have no love for him and now I understand more about divorce I will never unblock him! They cannot get a visa if we do not sponsor them can they?
Not a hope. Jobless, uneducated, no financial resources, I’ve got more chance of becoming president there than he has of getting out.
 

Masha

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 12, 2016
Messages
796
Is she actually dead? We have had an amazing number of actual resurrections from the dead here. Unless I saw the actual body then I wouldn’t believe anyone had died. She may well have been hiding in a cupboard while you were there.

Oh and tying your hands together, this would have been tying you up so you couldn’t leave!
This death thing works pretty well also for the other side. Why not ! It is an excellent idea for all mothers and fathers to protect their offspring from rats.I heard once that a very persistent rat was trying to marry a young Swedish girl , just 23 . He already had a w h i t e suit with a pink bow tie ready for himself when the mother of the girl called him and crying bitterly informed him of the tragic and unexpected death of her daughter who died in a car crash in her home town , saving her from rat hell. Meanwhile the girl had all her social media accounts suspended and phone number changed. Excellent job!
 

Laura2014

Staff Member/Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Nov 10, 2014
Messages
3,909
I removed Facebook messenger, deactivated my Facebook and blocked on the phone. Tonight is my first night of blissful peace!
It’s good to take a break from Social Media. If you do want to have an account again you can alter your settings and block him in advance and any of his family members or friends. As long as you use a different email or phone to sign up and maybe use a nickname instead of your real name then it should be ok. I don’t think we should have to stop contacting friends just to avoid them. Even with messenger you can vet messages and delete them without accepting them. As long as all your posts are customised or set to private and no one can tag you without your permission you can still enjoy your social media.
 

Masha

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 12, 2016
Messages
796
I stumbled across this forum around 9 months ago and it has truly saved me, so before I share my rat tale I truly want to thank everyone for sharing their experiences and advice xx.
My story started in September 2017, I went to Tunisia for the first time , as my brother was getting engaged to a Tunisian girl. I had no interest in meeting a man, just wanted sun and to lay by the pool. Until I saw a hotel security guard who was stunning... red flags should have gone up when on our first 5 minutes alone he gave me one of his rings, told me he loved me and wanted to marry me. Still when I look back at this I could kick myself for being so stupid. The next day I was whisked off to meet his family and spent the next week going out and about with them. It appeared the family had money so I thought I was safe... I did not spend a single dinar.. I returned to the UK and we were messaging all the time, he gave me his fb password and on his messenger there were loads of messages to women from around the world.... I asked him if he is out looking for a visa nd he claimed it was his cousins using his Facebook... messages to women saying he loved them and the women were rightly saying “you do not even know me!”... still I continued and I returned to Tunisia in October 2017.... this visit was totally different... I had to pay for absolutely everything... and he was quite happy to sit back and let me pay so this raised a red flag... but he seemed so genuine and his family were so lovely I thought it was me being judgemental... the family were all talking about us getting married and what can I say I got swept away with it all.... the rat told me that we would both pay our share for the wedding... I would need 20,000 dinars and I asked him will he pay the same and he said yes and he would buy my gold in line with the tradition there. I returned to the UK.... I planned to return in November and we were going to start wedding arrangements.. before I returned there was a lot of invitations to women on fb and he kept disappearing to the country where his cousins lived and would be out of contact... they all like to drink beer in the field... I saw all the invites and so I told him I am finished and he can keep drinking and playing on fb.... he says that someone (his Tunisian ex cousin) had hacked Facebook and was sending the invitations and it’s not him.... I did not speak to him for a couple of weeks as I wanted out... his cousin contacted me and she told me he had gone to police it’s was not him sending invitations. I started to speak to him again and I told him I m not sending 20,000 dinars for the wedding. I will be there with him and so he pay and I pay... he had asked for an iPhone and Adidas trainers and jack Daniels... so there I was taking all of this out there.... I have to say that I have never ever been as stupid as this and I am deeply embarrassed at my stupidity.... I returned in November and I was so unhappy with him I refused to make wedding plans... I was already trying to get out of this relationship. I was due to return in December to make arrangements for the wedding on New Year’s Eve... but I made excuses not to go... I said I was ill as I knew I had to get out of this... he was so upset that I did not go and would not pay for a big wedding he ran off to the country to a wedding and drinking... he had no concern of me being ill but just the annoyance that we were not going to be married and what people would say... after all the trouble on fb I did not trust him, we set up a new Facebook and strangely all the invitations stopped, so I thought how come this one was not hacked? Stupidly mid-December we were talking as his family were convincing me he had changed ... I went to Tunisia on Boxing Day with,y do,ents for marriage as I had done my bands and got my birth certificate copies. The family were so full on about the wedding I got caught up in it and as I was alone I felt I had no option, how could I say no.. no big wedding was planned but a small party at his house... I had to pay for everything. Day before we were going to sign contrac he tells me I have to buy my own ring... I cried, how cold I have fallen so low as this.... so I gave him the money so when we were in the shop it looked like he had bought the ring... I bought the most expensive ring in the shop as he thought he would keep the money left over so I spent it all on my ring! Then he wanted a party out in the countryside and I paid for that too. Another 5000 dinars..... just a do and tables so I could not work out how that cost 5000..... the night before I returned to the uk he asked me for a 1000 to buy a tool so he could work, I told him to sod off! I returned home... I told no friends I had married just my mum and brother.... I returned in February and beforehand told him I have no money and so do not ask, if you do you will never see me. I had been arguing with him at how disgusting it was that I had to pay for the wedding and my own ring.... I just wanted out.... the. Two days before I returned he said there was a summons from military and he would have to go unless we give them money... he said it would be 800 plus a bribe of 400 dinars.... I told him sorry no I have nothing... he has spent everything I have (he had not but I wanted to see if it was me or my money he loved)... so at the airport I said to him, if I give this money to you it is my last and I will have nothing, will you take it?//. Well, he did but you all knew that right!.... since then I have not returned I am in a living hell of trying to get-etc rid of him.... I do not know if I am married in the UK, how to divorce him... can I trust a lawyer in Tunisia was I have zero trust of anything there. He is constantly messaging saying he loves me and blah blah blah,... I have blocked quite a few times then I get scared that I need to know where he is to divorce.... so can anyone help me? I need this torture to end... I told him it’s over but he continues and comtinues with the emotional shit... I do not love him and will not return to him, I want out. How can I end this? Part of me does not want to pay to divorce him, I told him I paid enough he can divorce me.... sorry this is so long ladies...
Hello ! I have just read your post which has really touched me because it is so honest and transparent. The members here have all given good advice but I also think that if you want to avoid any additional expenses connected with legal advice you might contact the Tunisian embassy/consulate in the UK by calling them or sending them an email or registered letter with all the questions. They should know the answers.Take care and keep strong! It will soon end and it will sent you a shiver down your spine when you recollect it one day! Lucky escape ! Please do not call yourself stupid because you are not ! You are a warm and trusting person who fell into a rat trap but clever enough to open the cage like Squeak the little mouse. You have saved your cheese !!!
 

Amira

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 5, 2014
Messages
3,116
Yes I wish it was not automatically registered. I can honestly say that I will never return to Tunisia if I can help it.
Send the papers straight to England without informing you about it? So you got shock when you came to back to England ?No try to get Your divorce without going to Tunisia it is not ok to stay face to face With Your ex
 
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