How to find out if some one is ratting on me

AmberHeart

Lady Amberheart of Gafsa
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I hope no one would. My goodness. This guy was awful. I still have to divorce him, too... which just makes me even more tired, because it upsets me so much. He's also found his new bride. It's a lot to process.
Where is she from? Sounds legit not even divorced and has a new one. He’s pig shit :Evil::sick::sick::sick:
 

Mango Chutney

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Oh no...what a failure. I thought my comments would be uplifting in the effort to reduce the precious time ahead after the rat experience. I must revise my writing skills.
Haha, Masha....I knew your intent was healthy, it was just worded badly :D
You've been here for a long time, are incredibly bezness savvy....so we'll just blame the language barrier here :)

I just felt that for potential future victims, it was important we stressed that the damage is bad, recovery is grim...and rats are not like other men. In fact, in my opinion....they are not men :thumbsup:
 

Brasilgirl

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I hope no one would. My goodness. This guy was awful. I still have to divorce him, too... which just makes me even more tired, because it upsets me so much. He's also found his new bride. It's a lot to process.
Can you just let him do the divorce and leave it be? Let him pay for it. He will do it so he can marry his next victim.
I know it’s really hard to get through, and everyone has their own way of dealing. None of us can judge you as we’ve all had our own struggles. I still have relapses of the crying and hurt. It is a long process, but you will get through it and the hurt will be a memory. You’ll never forget, but you will feel less pain and more like you after a while. It’s a roller coaster, so hang on!
Go ahead and vent here all you want when you want. Share your feelings if it helps. Get it out of your system.
We will read and feel along with you. It’s okay. Do what helps you cope.
** big hugs **
 

Brasilgirl

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One lady was from Saudi Arabia, but the "stable woman" looks like she's from Indonesia. I honestly don't think he'll stay with her because I think he still will come around and focus on Europe or Canada, again. He has dreams of taking over the world and establishing a caliphate and all the other economical stuff, too.
He can have his dreams. But after you report him to the Canada and US imigrations, it will be only a dream for him. And his terrorist connections should get him on the no fly list.
 

AmberHeart

Lady Amberheart of Gafsa
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Wondering if In a case like Jisela’s she reported the rat not only marriage fraud but Radical sympathizer, is it possible Consulate help to annull marriage not even a divorce process?
 

AmberHeart

Lady Amberheart of Gafsa
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Not to be big details, but the agents in my country were really thorough and I know will address all of those things. I wonder if he could still marry in Europe though.
He can marry but having legal residence is other story. That background is flagged. He will be rejected.
 

Mango Chutney

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I can let him worry about the divorce, but having that connection to him still makes me really angry, violated, and feel dirty.
This does make sense, and psychologically, it will be a massive weight off your shoulders to have this direct tie to him severed, but speaking from my own experiences, it will not take away your anger, nor your feelings of being violated and dirty.
I did not marry mine, so I have no direct tie, but I still have anger at myself, I feel violated and dirty to the point that I'm frightened to have a smear test.
Due to the nature of the his assaults, I can't bear anybody touching me or looking 'there' at my dirty places....and that is one of many reasons I accepted that my recovery needed professional help.
I wonder if he could still marry in Europe though.
I agree with AmberHeart: Marry, yes; Emigrate, no.
The minute his name is typed into the system, his reported history will flag up....same as with my rat....their names, details and history are out there.

These kinda rats will still continue to scam, may even marry, with the deluded belief that they may still be able to get abroad, but mostly....they will scam for cash now, as it's pretty much the only option left available to them now, bar illegal immigration.
 

Brasilgirl

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I can let him worry about the divorce, but having that connection to him still makes me really angry, violated, and feel dirty. It's like I'm stuck thinking that I need to rush through divorcing him so his poison and pain stops affecting me, but I know that the divorce won't guarantee a clean slate emotionally either. I'm ashamed to be married to this guy, he was and is so terrible. I do think letting him be responsible for the divorce is correct. But, the idea of him coming back around, asking me about it, or anything else, or even saying a single word, makes me feel wild and all sorts of angry. It's disgusting what he did and the reasons why.
Just remember, you married someone else. He was not being the same person to you when you fell in love with him. You should not feel ashamed. This is not something you did wrong.
 

Going for the limit

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Terrorism is taken very seriously in all countrys not only will he be flagged but he should be investigated by tunisian authoritys.
What makes you think he is a terrorist jisela because to accuse someone of that is very serious , i dont need to see the information about him its just i am curious.
No doubt about it many muslims do blame the west for many things but us in turn also blame muslims.
Its a crazy world we live in and i think the biggest thieves and terrorists come from our own goverments.
You have nothing to be ashamed of and i can understand you want to detach yourself from him you have to do what is right for you and if its right for you then do it.
 

AmberHeart

Lady Amberheart of Gafsa
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How did he got first contact with you? What was the reason to approach?
 

AmberHeart

Lady Amberheart of Gafsa
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The first mask is to appear sweet and worried, concerned, then sickness and manipulation come afloat. How can they deliberately play this role over and over? How long did you stayed on your first visit to Tunisia? Did you marry st the first visit? They do the impossible to make their targets marry as soon as possible arguing morality and religious reasons. Wich later happen to be convenience and their laws.
 

Going for the limit

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How long did you know him before marraige jisela and did you marry on the first visit?
I really do feel like your struggling with alot and i think you are in shock.
I obviously was not in your situation and wasnt your friend to witness it but i do know many women who have married very religious people and they are struggling with it.
These women did not know the extent of how suffocating it is just by visiting tunisia for a few weeks at a time.
The reality soon hits when you live and breathe them everyday
I cant mention names on here but one lady after getting her religious hubby to the uk realised quickly what she had let herself in for.
She felt suffocated she lived and breathed islam and this woman claims to be a .converted muslim but she was a naughty muslim and not as religious as him.
I personally could not be with a religious man islam or any other religion.
I feel i am here for 1 life and thats it so i will do my upmost to enjoy it
 

AmberHeart

Lady Amberheart of Gafsa
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This was one of the reasons why my rat made me cancel one of the trips. He threw a tantrum saying ohhh so you will come and stay only two weeks? Then what! When are you coming back? I want you to be my wife not traveling every three or four months.. cancel that fucking trip.
 

AmberHeart

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Then other problem the next booked flight. Cause he wanted the wedding the next day, he said he already had waited too long and I was worried to marry without my family, I was supposed to pay for everything and my family would be absent.:rolleyes:
 

AmberHeart

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Without offending anyone i would boil my head if the hubby became religious .
I love to party, i love to.drink and no one will change that. As long as i dont hurt or steal etc from anyone then i live how i want.
This is the regular way for all of us. I was ok I Can accept insistence of converting cause I saw him kind at first, nothing alarming. And assuming we would spend years in his country where I knew no one nor the language. Practically depending on him except financially lol
 

Brasilgirl

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View attachment 51054

This is a screenshot from my rat's friend's list, and contacts. He was in communication with this person in an African country also known for terrorist activities. This was also information that was part of my reporting.
Well, it was his racism, anger, and him directly telling me that he wanted to convert others to Islam... threatening to divorce me over Islam. Also, he was on websites that promoted "taking over America" with Islam... he said he would work for gangs or related gang activity. He was constantly thinking about how to start groups, network, and basically dominate with Islam... he said he wanted to kill a man, would want to join military groups there especially in Syria or Palestine. It was 24-7 of being berated over politics and religion. Plus, the contacts he made, his violence towards me. He wanted to have children fast, and wanted to separate our children from my family. He sent videos of women covering themselves as in Saudi Arabia to my sister - condemning women who wore makeup. There's a lot of stuff that I kept in document form, plus screenshots, and forgive me but it's difficult to recall all the details now. But, basically, everything that I experienced was radical Islam and everything he did or said he wanted to do lingered around these topics and radicalism. He also simultaneously saw himself as a "bringer of peace."
that is scary. I am so glad you made it home, away from him.
 

Mango Chutney

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He idealized Hitler, too.
So did mine. There are pics on here somewhere of his Swastika's. He claimed Hitler was their friend, despite my showing him that Hitler referred to them as "Dirty monkeys" or something similar :rolleyes:
You would be amazed at how many rats idolise Hitler....loads of them have pics of him on their profiles...they are brainwashed and loopy :thumbsup:
Plus he demeaned me for having Jewish ancestry.
And mine kinda did this too. He discovered my little sis is Jewish (different mother), so Googled every known family name, to ensure I had no Jewish blood running through my veins. Aren't they vile creatures? :Evil:
Without offending anyone i would boil my head if the hubby became religious .
Please don't! We need you on the forum!
If worse comes to worse, grab your knickers, a toothbrush.....and hot foot it over the balcony to my sofa :D
Practically depending on him except financially lol
Ya.....that's where he would have depended on you :D
 
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