Introducing the Queen of one- liners our very own simple :)

Discussion in 'The Cat's Coffee House' started by tigerlil, Jul 4, 2013.

  1. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Remenber ,when your holidaying in Greece ,,"they got bills,there multiplying and theyre losing control" !!!
     
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  2. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Why did the chicken cross the road ??? it was trying to get a signal on its i phone 6 !!!:mad::mad:
     
  3. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    My ex rat once told me i was one in a million ..When i looked at his phone book ,i have to admit ,he was right
     
  4. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    I remember visiting my rat in Tunisia and getting that love sick feeling !!!Or Chalymidia as they call it ,,,
     
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  5. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    You know that tingley feeling you get when you see your rat at the airport !!! Thats common sense leaving your body ,,,
     
    Last edited: Apr 27, 2016
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  6. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    529c669c322ac_unicorn.jpg Trying to find an honest rat ,is harder than finding a unicorn ,,,
     
  7. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    I asked my rat if his arse was jealous ,because of the amount of shit that came out of his mouth !!
     
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  8. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Top 3 situations that require witnesses,,,,,..crimes,,accidents,,,, marriages ,,,,Need i say more !
     
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  9. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    I ran into my ex rat the other day .,,Hit reverse and ran into him again!!!
     
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  10. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    I just read that 4,153,237 ,people got married last year ,,,,Is it me whos just thick ,but shoudlnt that be an even number??
     
  11. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Loving a rat is the triumph of imagination over intelligence !!
     
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  12. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    All this rat busting has turned us all into cats ,,,,Dont ask meow !!
     
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  13. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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  14. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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  15. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Tourists in Tunisia are a lot like bank accounts ,,,Without a lot of money ,they dont generate a lot of interest !!!
     
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  16. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Virgin dosnt fly to tunisia !! Because no one would get on a plane that dosnt go all the way ...
     
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  17. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Lips that touch liquor touch other lips quicker,, so wrap it in latex ,if you dont want him to touch your paychecks !!
     
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  18. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    "one million sperm and you were the fastest ?" I said to my rat when he woke up at 4 pm to eat so he could go back to sleep,on a full stomache !!!
     
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  19. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Save your rat from the shame of prostitution ,,,dont pay him !!!
     
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  20. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Ladies ,,remember when you thought you"d never get over ,,whats his name !!!
     
  21. Sillygirl55

    Sillygirl55 Well-Known Member

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    Oh my God, I'm dying! :D There are some corkers on here, but that one wins hands down :D:D
     
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  22. Sillygirl55

    Sillygirl55 Well-Known Member

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    A genuine photo from my friends album, taken on ratboys bed!! Her passport and his, her bank card and money (the coins are English. Screenshot_2016-07-28-04-43-16.png
     
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  23. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    I used to always carry a photo of my rat in my purse...Just to remind me why there was no F***King money in there !!!
     
  24. Sillygirl55

    Sillygirl55 Well-Known Member

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    Needed that giggle :D:D Thank you @simple :love:
     
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  25. simple

    simple Well-Known Member

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    Wise words from simple !!!! People overcome adversity all the time ,,look at Beethoven ,they told him he was deaf, but did he listen !!
     
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