Is he a rat?

Discussion in 'Rat Behavior' started by Daria0992, Jun 22, 2018.

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Is he a rat

  1. Break up?

  2. Stay together?

  3. Rat?

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  1. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    Hi there ,

    I’m reading all your stories and getting shocked most of the time. Here’s my story. Which is still kind of on.
    So I met this guy online,he’s been living in uk for last 5 years we had a date after few day. Date was nice very open conversation m. He told me lot of things about him and lot of sensitive stuff too. Since day number two I feel like we are connected, we think the Same. Many times I was just about to say something and he said it. I feel in love with him obviously by end of the week. So did he (apparently) .. he keeps saying that he never felt this way , I’m different etc etc. We spend lot of time together. From the start he was saying there and there that he needs new phone etc but my money situation isn’t any better than his so he never asked me for anything. When we go together somewhere he pays. I met his daughter too n I got daughter as well so we get along really good. There was some questions about making spiritual promise in musk to be married not married but I said no. So he said we not gonna talk about it now. Otherwise he’s really nice to me, good manners etc etc. After I read this pages I don’t know what to say. I broke up with him without reason and then get back to him. Always through breakup he was saying that he will never love no one the same way but few times he was very rude. Writing mean messages. We always get back together. But I still don’t know? How do I know if he’s a rat?? He doesn’t have parents so no invitation in his. He’s got child so visa through that and I don’t have any money to be used for. I’m really desperate.
    Daria
     
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  2. Laura2014

    Laura2014 Well-Known Member

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    Welcome Daria, so he’s living in the UK? Does he have an English wife?

    Is he working in the UK and have a permanent citizenship? What are his living arrangements? Is he separated from his child’s mother?
     
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  3. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    Yes they been separated for few years not divorced yet. She is British. He’s working normally but he’s visa ends soon. He said he will reapply through his child again. He has own place.
     
  4. Laura2014

    Laura2014 Well-Known Member

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    Thanks Daria, Are you also a UK citizen? Do you know much about how he came here? Anything about his wife? You are right to be cautious. Especially with mean or rude messages to you. Unfortunately they do often have an unpleasant side which emerges when things don’t go their way. It’s very reasonable for you to try and find out what you can about him. This would be normal in his country for a girls family to check him out, especially since you have a child of your own.
     
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  5. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    I read a story like that here before. Did you search here for him? What's his name ?
     
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  6. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    I’m EU citizen he came here through his wife. She married him in Tunisia and take him here where they were living together few years and had a child. She seem to be bit older than him but not too much. She wanted to met me because her daughter and my one become a good friends. But I wasn’t ready and now while she sees they’re getting along she doesn’t want to met up anymore. I don’t know if he was rude because I broke up with him without reason or reveal his real self out.
     
  7. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    I search for him today and haven’t found him.
     
  8. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    He got to the UK five years ago and is seperated from his wife already. He wants an urfi marriage, he wants a phone, he writes rude messages, he tells you that he has no parents but he must have the rest of his family in Tunisia.
    Let me guess, he wants the urfi marriage so he can tell you to move in with you so he has a woman who will do everything for him, while he sends his earned money to his family in Tunisia, to get the nest ready for when he has send enough money to marry his young tunisian virgin bride
     
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  9. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    So he got his visa child. Did you talk to his wife on the phone or did he tell you that she wanted to meet you ?
     
  10. Laura2014

    Laura2014 Well-Known Member

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    @Daria0992 most have multiple Facebook accounts and if he found you on line he is probably on a number of dating sites. He may have different names and several email addresses so he can open multiple Facebook Accounts.
     
  11. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    That she wants to met I read it myself
     
  12. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    Oh god it sound so horrible... do they swear on life’s too if they lying???
     
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  13. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    Where did you read that :confused:
     
  14. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    Messages on WhatsApp I’m certain that’s really her.
     
  15. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    The rats swear on their mothers grave, even if she is still alive :D
     
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  16. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    But the parents are, I saw it as a memory on Fb both of them pictures as they memory. With his brothers saying there stuff
     
  17. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    Oh god I feel sick a bit
     
  18. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    Good old FB :whistle: ;)
     
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  19. Laura2014

    Laura2014 Well-Known Member

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    They would swear black was white. Mine had a father who was dying in hospital, all the family were gathered at the deathbed! He cried like a baby at the loss of his beloved father. (His father was actually at home feeding the chickens and was fit as a flee).
     
  20. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    He more swear on his kid
     
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  21. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    I don’t know what to do. I feel so confused. I never been happier it’s hard to let go
     
  22. Laura2014

    Laura2014 Well-Known Member

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    Just read here. Ask questions and be cautious. If something does not feel right it often isn’t. But you don’t have to do anything. No one here will put you under pressure to do anything but we are here to help. The responses may be a bit raw sometimes but that’s from the experience we have gained over time.
     
  23. Daria0992

    Daria0992 Member

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    This is unbelievable ...
     
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  24. Laura2014

    Laura2014 Well-Known Member

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    Have you read my thread; if it’s your first time here read this?

    It’s an eye opener.... I could fill a page with his stories....
     
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  25. Liona

    Liona Well-Known Member

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    Hello Daria, and welcome!
    Yes, they do swear on their lives, on their mothers lives, on God and many other things when they are lying.
    On your place I would speak with his wife.
     
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