Welcome to TLR

let's spend a week together

tutusandfrogs

Major Ratslayer
He's in SA and he's a pastry chef. I never asked for money, he just offers it...and he wanted me to leave my part time job so he covers what I would have made monthly.
 

tutusandfrogs

Major Ratslayer
He's never asked me for a dime and refuses to let me pay for anything. I have no reason to lie that he's sending me money. Yes, I'm 38, he is 30. I can't tell you why he wants to help me or what his plan is... but it is what it is.
 

wild angel

Major Ratslayer
He's never asked me for a dime and refuses to let me pay for anything. I have no reason to lie that he's sending me money. Yes, I'm 38, he is 30. I can't tell you why he wants to help me or what his plan is... but it is what it is.
hmm:confused:This is not typical for rat behavior,although maybe he behaves like a gentleman with you.;)But know they have many scenarios,everything can change any second.
 

simple

Major Ratslayer
He's in SA and he's a pastry chef. I never asked for money, he just offers it...and he wanted me to leave my part time job so he covers what I would have made monthly.
I find this tactic disturbing...If you leave your job and completly rely on him to send money ,your at his mercy .You havnt met the guy so why are you allowing him to do this ??Its all internet bullshit and trash talk about love and a happy life together .Are you a Tunisian woman who lives in Canada ??And why are you having visa problems to go see him ??He proberly wont be able to visit you ,because of visa restrictions .I hope your not talking about a proxy marriage via the internet to sort visa applications..It all seems to good to true....Its clever of you to come on here and ask questions ,but please be careful as none of this makes sense ,a Tunisian guy fishing women on the internet is not a good sign and sending you money is unheard of .
 

simple

Major Ratslayer
He's in SA and he's a pastry chef. I never asked for money, he just offers it...and he wanted me to leave my part time job so he covers what I would have made monthly.
A pasty chef ,in a Tunisian franchised hotel based in Saudi ?? Is this how he got a working visa prehaps..Did he work as a pastry chef in a hotel in Tunisia
 

milala

Ratslayer
My friends,l would love to get your opinion on following situation. I got an "invitation" from Tunisian man,30 years old,that suggested me to spend a week together in Tunisia. He said it straight that he is not looking for a relationship and after September he is leaving Tunisia and go back to France,where he lived for 8 years. So far so good. BUT: he wants me to pay for the apartment costs,probably for rent a car and etc. Meanwhile he needed money for rent /80 eur and for fixing his phone/70 EUR. After my bad experience with Tunisian boyfriend(read thread Age is just a number),my ALARM has turned on,because l don't trust him. I am afraid to travel,because what if he doesn't even show up ? He wants me to send half of money for the apartment in advance. I must admit that he is nothing like other guys that write me on Instagram. He is polite and not annoying. But l saw his profile....he only has women following him. When we speak l have a good feeling,but just too many doubts. I told him about my bad experience and he said that he wish that would never happen to me. So is it common for a woman to pay for such a holidays ? l would cover my costs of course. By the way,he has a job in casino. Thank you for your opinions.
Please don,t take this negatively but In my opinion if a man from anyplace In the world invites you to spend time with him, and asks you to pay for it and buy him things. You should never ever accept. Something is very wrong in that altogether, 100%
 

Liona

Major Ratslayer
I had to read some older posts of yours @tutusandfrogs , though not all of them so I might miss some important information still. And now I am absolutely confused. You did not meet neither your 1rst Tunisian nor the 2nd one. All your communication with both are / was on Internet. And you call this " relationships". Are you serious?:confused: Your second man "feeling jealous" about relationships which never existed actually. He has never seen you but he bothers to send you the money regularly. Seems like some important details are missed. Otherwise all this sounds like a Looking Glass story.
 

Croydon girl

Major Ratslayer
I had to read some older posts of yours @tutusandfrogs , though not all of them so I might miss some important information still. And now I am absolutely confused. You did not meet neither your 1rst Tunisian nor the 2nd one. All your communication with both are / was on Internet. And you call this " relationships". Are you serious?:confused: Your second man "feeling jealous" about relationships which never existed actually. He has never seen you but he bothers to send you the money regularly. Seems like some important details are missed. Otherwise all this sounds like a Looking Glass story.
All sounds really strange! Why you would you accept money from a stranger? You are not teenager who doesn't know any better! Bloody creepy!
 

Liona

Major Ratslayer
All sounds really strange! Why you would you accept money from a stranger? You are not teenager who doesn't know any better! Bloody creepy!
I would not accept money not only from a stranger :). Seems I have to change something in my life. :D
I could easily think of some adult women who seriously believe their on-line chatting is "a relationships".:whistle: Holly collie! Even when a woman meets her man 2-3 times in the year this could not be supposed as a relationship, it's just a fling, sometimes long-term , but still a fling, not more. It would be nice to call things by their proper names.
 
Last edited:

tipme

Major Ratslayer
Run for the hills ! Don’t go he is a rat for sure. I rather give the money to the Salvation Army than to this rat.
there is a casino in sousse.but see telling him your last realishop down the line you will get it throw back in your face and when the name calling starts as it does you will be a dirty woman.save yourself heartache and your moneyx
 

tipme

Major Ratslayer
Are you serious? He’s asking you for money,money and more money! And virtually saying he wants sex ,not a relationship. What are you unsure about?? He isn’t even bothering with sweet talk because he thinks you’re so easy! He doesn’t want you to have another bad experience,he IS another bad experience. Run...and get this idiot out of your life
and think of your health ,how many tourists has he been with,and aids is rife in tunisa
 

tipme

Major Ratslayer
legal or illegal...he wanted me to pay for the apartment,he wanted me to rent a car but not at the airport,but in the city he lives because he had no money to come to Djerba....and he told me he was working all summer....l am blonde ....but not that kind of blonde....lol
derba is full of rats and when there known from other tourist resorts thats were they go
 

tipme

Major Ratslayer
You know what. I would not of let on you had cancelled. And I would of guarenteed he would of started asking for more presents. More expensive £100pound trainers went to debenhams once and brought a dear aftershave was new out sure he didn't like it and sold it but told me his.friend broke it. The requests would of been for a lot more ciggies which r cheaper there jeans which r made there phones and he probably would not of answered phone to make u worry then phone bk on with some excuse family died and need something brought over. Also I would of brought clothes everytime without asking at the beginning loved them then later on they were crap clothes. See your holiday your paying for two. And if they have little cousins neices r nephews you land up taking them days out cos they have nothing the list goes on. You would be better of booking a holiday paying for your mate to go. And don't forget later on the realishop there moody days don't want to do nothing just sit and watch TV. Yeah you really come over from other side of world to sit in and watch TV. That's cos your there meal ticket and don't want anyone else to buy it. End of holiday moody don't talk excuse cos your leaving don't want you to go (not that I'm in love) no they don't get no more free days. Think about it two weeks they don't have to spend money then another one comes another two weeks don't have to put hand in pocket. So u get on plane and u don't no wars going on then u reach home and they phone make sure u got home safe. Then next day the bombarding phone calls then stop fuck your head up again then on phone again. Do u really want this I still get good days bad days and yet I'm the more stronger one cos karma a great thing. Only I have real bad trust issues with people. But u done the right thing cos your health your wealth another rat bites the dust x
hi roxy nice to see you on here .hows the wee man
 

tutusandfrogs

Major Ratslayer
It's possible, maybe likely. I understand all of that but not the harsh judgement. It may not be a traditional relationship, but to me, it is a relationship. If I get hurt, I'll share with you I was hurt.

Being polyamorous wasn't a decision I made, I just am. I know it's super strange and difficult to understand - even for myself. That said, my last relationship was 13 years and monogamous and I remained faithful even though I tend to get emotionally attached to people easily.

My polyamorous brain is still there but it's something I may never freely be because of the stigma and the difficulty in finding an accepting partner. Sharing someone physically is one thing, but emotionally totally different, I understand that and accept that of loving a monogamous person.

I know I might be making a mistake but i can't stop. One thing for sure, I will never sponsor someone to move to Canada. If I marry and this starts coming up then I know the true intentions.

He never worked at a hotel, he worked in an independent bakery...in response to a question above.

In response to accepting money - I have a full time professional career. I was working a couple nights a week part time, but I am fine without the money. He didn't want me to work this part time job so he asked me if I would stop and he wanted to send me the money I'm losing by doing that. As for the larger sums - it's because he wanted to buy me gifts. It's not preplanned, he just sends me the western union slip and tells me to go.

I'm not a stupid or uneducated woman, I know what I'm getting in to and the risks - but at the moment I. happy and I'm enjoying that.

I'm going to Tunisia in March, which he has paid for the car and my AirBnB. I'm bringing money (obviously) but he's determined that I won't pay for anything. We will see, of course, but I don't doubt his genuineness.
 

MH007

Administrator
Staff member
It's possible, maybe likely. I understand all of that but not the harsh judgement. It may not be a traditional relationship, but to me, it is a relationship. If I get hurt, I'll share with you I was hurt.

Being polyamorous wasn't a decision I made, I just am. I know it's super strange and difficult to understand - even for myself. That said, my last relationship was 13 years and monogamous and I remained faithful even though I tend to get emotionally attached to people easily.

My polyamorous brain is still there but it's something I may never freely be because of the stigma and the difficulty in finding an accepting partner. Sharing someone physically is one thing, but emotionally totally different, I understand that and accept that of loving a monogamous person.

I know I might be making a mistake but i can't stop. One thing for sure, I will never sponsor someone to move to Canada. If I marry and this starts coming up then I know the true intentions.

He never worked at a hotel, he worked in an independent bakery...in response to a question above.

In response to accepting money - I have a full time professional career. I was working a couple nights a week part time, but I am fine without the money. He didn't want me to work this part time job so he asked me if I would stop and he wanted to send me the money I'm losing by doing that. As for the larger sums - it's because he wanted to buy me gifts. It's not preplanned, he just sends me the western union slip and tells me to go.

I'm not a stupid or uneducated woman, I know what I'm getting in to and the risks - but at the moment I. happy and I'm enjoying that.

I'm going to Tunisia in March, which he has paid for the car and my AirBnB. I'm bringing money (obviously) but he's determined that I won't pay for anything. We will see, of course, but I don't doubt his genuineness.
There was no harsh judgement from me - just curiosity and interest

MH x
 

Liona

Major Ratslayer
You are being used - I wish you would see it.
To be honest I still did not see her being used at the moment. Actually her boyfriend is doing what most of our members-women did- trying to please the woman he likes. Quite a lot of women were happy to support their men with money.
In other thread @tutusandfrogs mentioned she had to give him some control over her, so that's the only thing that "switched" me on so far. But if she does not feel any discomfort about this, then it's ok may be.
Tutusafrogs sounds sensible, plus she is aware about some possible pitfalls, so there is a chance she feels if something goes wrong.
There was no harsh judgement from me
I guess it was me when I said "fling". May be I used it wrong? I understand this word as something more than just a friendship but still not an actual relationships.
 

Liona

Major Ratslayer
I forgot to add [email protected] , you will need all your common sense ( and may be common sense of someone else also) when you go to meet your man in Tunisia. Because due to sunshine or sea breeze or something else smartest of us lost our head and made huge mistakes and never could explain how did it happen.
 

ismail

Rat Expert
This man intentions are clear, he is not probably a 100% rat because rats don't even take the risk to waste money on women they just met online. If i'm not wrong, this guy only need one thing : sex.
 

simple

Major Ratslayer
This man intentions are clear, he is not probably a 100% rat because rats don't even take the risk to waste money on women they just met online. If i'm not wrong, this guy only need one thing : sex.
He can spend less money and visit a brothel ,or have a prostitute visit his room for 20 dn and a cream pastry ..I dont think its for sex ,i think hes using her, so she is at his mercy and obligated to do anything he wants ..Its not that i believe that all Tunisian men are rats ,,i just think that as a man he is obliged to send money to his family first and im sure he dosnt earn enough to do so ,if he is sending 300 or 400 dollars a month to Canada...Thats a lot of money
 

Croydon girl

Major Ratslayer
He can spend less money and visit a brothel ,or have a prostitute visit his room for 20 dn and a cream pastry ..I dont think its for sex ,i think hes using her, so she is at his mercy and obligated to do anything he wants ..Its not that i believe that all Tunisian men are rats ,,i just think that as a man he is obliged to send money to his family first and im sure he dosnt earn enough to do so ,if he is sending 300 or 400 dollars a month to Canada...Thats a lot of money
My thoughts exactly!
 

Liona

Major Ratslayer
if he is sending 300 or 400 dollars a month to Canada...
I did not pay a lot of attention to the origin country of tutusandfrogs. And when it happened it changed everything. Suddenly it came to my mind: is it possible he would have sent all these money to the woman from less attractive for living country?:confused:


I am afraid it's true:
i think hes using her, so she is at his mercy and obligated to do anything he wants ..

He 's acting exactly like salesman who presents you some free small thing and you feel yourself obliged to visit his shop, but after you find yourself spending a fortune for some shitty big thing.
 
Top