Looking for answers

Truthseeker

Member
Hi everyone. Firstly, thank you for approving my request to join, much appreciated!

I'm looking for info as I think someone I know may be being scammed. They met 'Jimmy' aka Nejib Merai, a member of the entertainment team, while on holiday at Hotel Iberostar Belisaire in October 2012/13, by the December of the same year he applied for a visa with her as a sponsor to come to the U.K., luckily he was unsuccessful. They have continued to have a relationship where she travels a few times a year to visit him. They have recently announced their engagement and are planning to marry. Obviously alarm bells started ringing immediately but the person is in denial . So I am now investigating to see if I can find any evidence to try to prove to her that he is up to no good. She is planning to take her children to meet him for the first time this half term and the thought of them getting mixed up in all of this horrifies me. I would be grateful if you could share any potential information please. You can see a photo of him by searching his name on Facebook, just in case he's using any alias's.

Thank you for reading x
 

Mango Chutney

Moderator
Staff member
Hi everyone. Firstly, thank you for approving my request to join, much appreciated!

I'm looking for info as I think someone I know may be being scammed. They met 'Jimmy' aka Nejib Merai, a member of the entertainment team, while on holiday at Hotel Iberostar Belisaire in October 2012/13, by the December of the same year he applied for a visa with her as a sponsor to come to the U.K., luckily he was unsuccessful. They have continued to have a relationship where she travels a few times a year to visit him. They have recently announced their engagement and are planning to marry. Obviously alarm bells started ringing immediately but the person is in denial . So I am now investigating to see if I can find any evidence to try to prove to her that he is up to no good. She is planning to take her children to meet him for the first time this half term and the thought of them getting mixed up in all of this horrifies me. I would be grateful if you could share any potential information please. You can see a photo of him by searching his name on Facebook, just in case he's using any alias's.

Thank you for reading x
Hi, Truthseeker, welcome to TLR :)

To prove he is a rat, are you able to give a little more detail please?

So far, I have:
* He is animation staff.
* He already tried for a visa to the UK.
* The female already has children.
These in themselves are usually a bad sign, however, more detail would help.
* Is there an age gap?
* Has he ever asked her for money?
* Is he marrying her to try for a spouse visa?
* How much time has she actually spent with him in the flesh?
* When she visits, where do they stay?
 

Heidi

Inactive
'Jimmy' aka Nejib Merai

Unbenannt.PNG321.PNG

where does he work now or is he getting sponsered by the victim....
 

Truthseeker

Member
Hi, Truthseeker, welcome to TLR :)

To prove he is a rat, are you able to give a little more detail please?

So far, I have:
* He is animation staff.
* He already tried for a visa to the UK.
* The female already has children.
These in themselves are usually a bad sign, however, more detail would help.
* Is there an age gap?
* Has he ever asked her for money?
* Is he marrying her to try for a spouse visa?
* How much time has she actually spent with him in the flesh?
* When she visits, where do they stay?
Hi Mango Chutney,

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply!

It's a difficult situation because it's not technically someone that would open up to me. It's my husbands ex wife so she hasn't exactly been very open.

What I do know is that she is 49 and he is mid 30's ish. She's met his family and his mother told her it was a good idea for him to marry to come to the uk (err yeah obviously if you're on the lookout for a visa!). I don't know if he's asked her for money, but I do know she is in a very well paid job in the U.K. And can afford to go to Tunisia a few times a year to visit him. She said once that she was waiting for him to finish work while she was there, I got the impression she's done a lot of hanging around waiting for him when she visits. I think, although I'm not sure, that she either hires an appartment or books a hotel when she visits. Looking back it's been since the October 2014, I was mistaken when I said 2012/3, so in total I'd say she's been over there for around 12 weeks when you add up all of the visits xx
 

Heidi

Inactive
As far as I know he still works there..... like I said above it's difficult to get further info. I know she visits him in hammamet x
I'm asking because he is in the hotel reviews in 2014

Unbenannt.PNGmlpoi.PNG

https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/LocationPhotoDirectLink-g297943-d581392-i112738287-Medina_Belisaire_Thalasso-Hammamet_Nabeul_Governorate.html

but I can't find him in the reviews from 2017
The thing is, some victims get jealous if their rat keeps working in the animation bezness and rather pay for his keep than having him work at a hotel. Since she visits him several times each year, I'm sure that she rented an apartment and he lives there all the time.
And yes, I think that he is a rat :(
 

Heidi

Inactive
He likes to travel ;)

l'Ambassade du Belgique en Tunis


Merai Nejib
Mon, 22 Oct 2012 13:14 EDT
visa to a friend
hello, I am contacting you as an embassadede belgium in tunisia, because I want to go on holiday in Belgium with a friend down there, but I do not know how to do all the papers to prepare before going to ask for the visachez you, and thank you much for your attention, my e-mail; [email protected]

https://embassy-finder.com/fr/belgium_in_tunis_tunisia?page=22
 

Amira

Rat Expert
Do not think he pays anything for rent and I do not think he's so good at the hotel that he can afford to pay so probably it's she who pays for everything and according to this page, it's a bad sign . Probably, maybe there are other women who also wonder behind his mask. Maybe I'm wrong? Hope it
 

Truthseeker

Member
I'm asking because he is in the hotel reviews in 2014

View attachment 34959

https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/LocationPhotoDirectLink-g297943-d581392-i112738287-Medina_Belisaire_Thalasso-Hammamet_Nabeul_Governorate.html

but I can't find him in the reviews from 2017
The thing is, some victims get jealous if their rat keeps working in the animation bezness and rather pay for his keep than having him work at a hotel. Since she visits him several times each year, I'm sure that she rented an apartment and he lives there all the time.
And yes, I think that he is a rat :(
Yes, that's him. I have been digging myself and seen this photo and also the lack of mentions recently.

Everything we know about their relationship leads to more and more doubts. Being totally honest, it is not up to us to save her from her own error of judgment but our main concern is the children. I have tried to reassure my partner that it's surely highly unlikely for them to be hurt in any way on the planned trip in October as that would ruin the plan.

The problem we have, is that without any solid evidence my partner is beginning to look like my husband just being an arse for the sake of it in denying his children permission to go there to meet him. If she decided to go to court there is no doubt a judge would allow it as there is no proof for concern of their welfare.

My husband is desperately hitting his head against a brick wall over it all :(.

The reason I posted here was in the desperate hope someone would know Jimmy and have some evidence to prove his intentions are less than honourable.

One other little bit of info, we know he outright lied early on in the relationship but again, we have no proof! Jimmy told my husbands ex that he didn't speak to her for a week because my husband had contacted him directly. She believed him but honestly, he didn't!

Thank you to everyone for your replies again, even if there is no outright proof it does help to know you also share our concerns xx
 

Truthseeker

Member
He likes to travel ;)

l'Ambassade du Belgique en Tunis


Merai Nejib
Mon, 22 Oct 2012 13:14 EDT
visa to a friend
hello, I am contacting you as an embassadede belgium in tunisia, because I want to go on holiday in Belgium with a friend down there, but I do not know how to do all the papers to prepare before going to ask for the visachez you, and thank you much for your attention, my e-mail; [email protected]

https://embassy-finder.com/fr/belgium_in_tunis_tunisia?page=22
Yes seen this too! He apparently said his visa was denied.....again! It's all so dodgy but she refuses to see it :( thank you xx
 

Truthseeker

Member
Do not think he pays anything for rent and I do not think he's so good at the hotel that he can afford to pay so probably it's she who pays for everything and according to this page, it's a bad sign . Probably, maybe there are other women who also wonder behind his mask. Maybe I'm wrong? Hope it
We sincerely hope we're wrong too! It would make us so happy to see things work out and for the children not to be part of a web of lies, but we also doubt it very much :( x
 

Truthseeker

Member
What else did you find :)
That's about it I think, I'm trying to remember every bit of info but it's been going on so long now it's difficult. Like I said, everything we know points to him being a rat, but she is adamant he is sincere. I fear we've hit a dead end and the only thing we can do is let it run its course. I will have another sneaky look at her Facebook, I know there are no photos of him or them together at all! But she has checked in to a few places so maybe there will be a lead there somewhere x
 

Truthseeker

Member
In October 2016 she checked in at the green golf hotel in hammamet, so obviously still then she wasn't able to stay with him wherever he lives.....
 

Amira

Rat Expert
All men in Tunisia are of course not bad but I think that all of them want a better life and marrying foreign women is the ticket out of Tunsia. Would have been very skeptical because she does not know the culture enough and the language and, according to what I have read, they have no respect for women traveling alone, divorced and having children from past relationships they look down on us and we are unbelievers in their eyes . She does not have to experience the same as the rest of us have experienced. She does not have to be exploited and they have not understood economics. Take good care of her and refer her to all sides regarding bezness
 

Heidi

Inactive
In October 2016 she checked in at the green golf hotel in hammamet, so obviously still then she wasn't able to stay with him wherever he lives.....
He might work there now ;)

Hotel review
Good hotel in Yasmine Hammamet. Large rooms with a nice view. The pool is large with a beautiful garden. Good food in the restaurant. Good service. Thanks for the entertainers Jimmy.

https://www.tripadvisor.de/Hotel_Review-g297943-d316534-Reviews-Hotel_Green_Golf-Hammamet_Nabeul_Governorate.html

Had a great stay at the green golf
Lovely friendly hotel with great staff
Rooms good staff keep them really clean
Not a large hotel but lots of atmosphere
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐To Jimmy the entertainments guy.He does an amazing job during the day and in the evening making our stay very enjoyable.
We will def return to this hotel

https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ShowUserReviews-g297943-d316534-r263125564-Hotel_Green_Golf-Hammamet_Nabeul_Governorate.html
 

Truthseeker

Member
All men in Tunisia are of course not bad but I think that all of them want a better life and marrying foreign women is the ticket out of Tunsia. Would have been very skeptical because she does not know the culture enough and the language and, according to what I have read, they have no respect for women traveling alone, divorced and having children from past relationships they look down on us and we are unbelievers in their eyes . She does not have to experience the same as the rest of us have experienced. She does not have to be exploited and they have not understood economics. Take good care of her and refer her to all sides regarding bezness
Thank you Amira, we have been doing our best to warn her but like most victims she has been totally suckered in to thinking he is reputable. I really hope for her sake and the children's that our doubts are unfounded x
 

Truthseeker

Member
He might work there now ;)

Hotel review
Good hotel in Yasmine Hammamet. Large rooms with a nice view. The pool is large with a beautiful garden. Good food in the restaurant. Good service. Thanks for the entertainers Jimmy.

https://www.tripadvisor.de/Hotel_Review-g297943-d316534-Reviews-Hotel_Green_Golf-Hammamet_Nabeul_Governorate.html

Had a great stay at the green golf
Lovely friendly hotel with great staff
Rooms good staff keep them really clean
Not a large hotel but lots of atmosphere
⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐To Jimmy the entertainments guy.He does an amazing job during the day and in the evening making our stay very enjoyable.
We will def return to this hotel

https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/ShowUserReviews-g297943-d316534-r263125564-Hotel_Green_Golf-Hammamet_Nabeul_Governorate.html
It does look that way, thank you for your help :). I don't think at this stage that we can stop her taking the children but I have advised my partner to ask for the following information before giving his permission for them to travel:

1. Full flight details.
2. Name and address of the hotel they will be staying at.
3. Full name and address of Jimmy (aka Nejib)
4. To be contacted daily by the children.
 

Big Bang Theory

Senior Rat Expert
It does look that way, thank you for your help :). I don't think at this stage that we can stop her taking the children but I have advised my partner to ask for the following information before giving his permission for them to travel:

1. Full flight details.
2. Name and address of the hotel they will be staying at.
3. Full name and address of Jimmy (aka Nejib)
4. To be contacted daily by the children.
Do you know if she is in contact with any other English women who live there or visit regularly?
If not I can send you some links and it's probably worth mentioning it to her - it will be safer if she has some contacts and isn't totally dependent on him - also would be nicer for her to meet someone for coffee/beach/shopping/wine rather than just hanging around waiting for him ;)
 

Mango Chutney

Moderator
Staff member
Hi Mango Chutney,

Thank you so much for taking the time to reply!

It's a difficult situation because it's not technically someone that would open up to me. It's my husbands ex wife so she hasn't exactly been very open.

What I do know is that she is 49 and he is mid 30's ish. She's met his family and his mother told her it was a good idea for him to marry to come to the uk (err yeah obviously if you're on the lookout for a visa!). I don't know if he's asked her for money, but I do know she is in a very well paid job in the U.K. And can afford to go to Tunisia a few times a year to visit him. She said once that she was waiting for him to finish work while she was there, I got the impression she's done a lot of hanging around waiting for him when she visits. I think, although I'm not sure, that she either hires an appartment or books a hotel when she visits. Looking back it's been since the October 2014, I was mistaken when I said 2012/3, so in total I'd say she's been over there for around 12 weeks when you add up all of the visits xx
Well, he's a rat, of that I'm sure having had the age gap confirmed on top of everything else, but if she is not willing to accept this, then she must learn the hard way. Unfortunately, as usual....there are innocent kids being dragged into this scam :Evil:
The problem is, the kids will form a bond with him, so if marriage and a visa to the UK are forthcoming, they too will suffer when he ups and leaves to buy his Tunisian virgin wife once he's saved the cash.
With regards to the kids safety in Tunisia, I'll be the first to admit....I wouldn't let my kids set foot in that country and I can completely understand your husband's fear.
However, other people do take children there regularly and they do come back safe and sound.
I say this not because I agree with them going there, but with the knowledge that your husband probably cannot stop her taking them there without good reason, and so his mind needs putting at rest.
What a horrible position for the kiddies father to be in!
Follow BBT's advice (if the mother will listen to you), suggest that she know other people there so she is not 100% dependent on him.
Details of the children's exact location and daily contact are a must, I do agree with you there. Should anything happen to concern your husband, there is the British Embassy for advice...and if worse comes to worse, the children are only a two hour flight away (Tunisair fly daily from London).
Ideally, the children will be staying in a hotel, but yes....get this Jimmy's contact too, it is their father's right to have these details.
Could you suggest the ex wife visit this site, (just to read around) or would it create a problem if she sees this thread?
 

Truthseeker

Member
Do you know if she is in contact with any other English women who live there or visit regularly?
If not I can send you some links and it's probably worth mentioning it to her - it will be safer if she has some contacts and isn't totally dependent on him - also would be nicer for her to meet someone for coffee/beach/shopping/wine rather than just hanging around waiting for him ;)
Hi Big Bang Theory, thank you for your reply. I must admit I don't know who she knows over there. My husband says she's met another British lady that's recently got married to a Tunisian man, I have no idea if this is one of Jimmy's friends or just someone she's met whilst staying in a hotel. The links could be useful though, I don't know if she would act upon them but it's a good idea anyway, thank you x
 

Truthseeker

Member
Well, he's a rat, of that I'm sure having had the age gap confirmed on top of everything else, but if she is not willing to accept this, then she must learn the hard way. Unfortunately, as usual....there are innocent kids being dragged into this scam :Evil:
The problem is, the kids will form a bond with him, so if marriage and a visa to the UK are forthcoming, they too will suffer when he ups and leaves to buy his Tunisian virgin wife once he's saved the cash.
With regards to the kids safety in Tunisia, I'll be the first to admit....I wouldn't let my kids set foot in that country and I can completely understand your husband's fear.
However, other people do take children there regularly and they do come back safe and sound.
I say this not because I agree with them going there, but with the knowledge that your husband probably cannot stop her taking them there without good reason, and so his mind needs putting at rest.
What a horrible position for the kiddies father to be in!
Follow BBT's advice (if the mother will listen to you), suggest that she know other people there so she is not 100% dependent on him.
Details of the children's exact location and daily contact are a must, I do agree with you there. Should anything happen to concern your husband, there is the British Embassy for advice...and if worse comes to worse, the children are only a two hour flight away (Tunisair fly daily from London).
Ideally, the children will be staying in a hotel, but yes....get this Jimmy's contact too, it is their father's right to have these details.
Could you suggest the ex wife visit this site, (just to read around) or would it create a problem if she sees this thread?
Hi again and thank you for your reply :). Oh gosh, the you know what would definitely hit the fan if she knew I'd been digging! She is a very proud and stubborn woman (aren't we all a little though ;) ) so someone going behind her back to investigate really wouldn't go down well! My husband is seeing his children later and she will be there of course when he drops them back home. He is going to take one last opportunity to try to make her see sense, but with no proof I fear he will not get anywhere :(. They are due to travel this weekend so time is running out and without something concrete I very much doubt she will listen to his pleas now, she hasn't taken any notice before :( x
 

Truthseeker

Member
@Truthseeker , what do her parents think about the situation? Can't her mother go with them to Tunisia, to "help" with the children and take a good look at the rat and his family? What kind of work does the rat have in mind in the UK?
Hi Heidi, she isn't very close to her Mum and her Dad passed away when she was young. Funnily enough, her mother married someone she didn't know very well and my husband's ex has a great deal of resentment for him! Odd then that she should choose to put her children in the same position :( x
 

Big Bang Theory

Senior Rat Expert
Hi Big Bang Theory, thank you for your reply. I must admit I don't know who she knows over there. My husband says she's met another British lady that's recently got married to a Tunisian man, I have no idea if this is one of Jimmy's friends or just someone she's met whilst staying in a hotel. The links could be useful though, I don't know if she would act upon them but it's a good idea anyway, thank you x
This is the best facebook group for TWAGS - they are down to earth (not all wearing rose tinted glasses), they support each other's (good) relationships but are not afraid to tell the truth when they see big red signs of bezness - it might come better if she hears the truth from people who are in relationships like she is rather than people on the outside.
Also there are a few members there who live in Hamamet she could meet up with or help her if the shit does hit the fan.
Maybe your husband could suggest she join the group so that she has support??
It's called Tunisian's Wives & Girlfriends Safe Haven
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1425490644426222/?ref=group_browse_new
 

Truthseeker

Member
This is the best facebook group for TWAGS - they are down to earth (not all wearing rose tinted glasses), they support each other's (good) relationships but are not afraid to tell the truth when they see big red signs of bezness - it might come better if she hears the truth from people who are in relationships like she is rather than people on the outside.
Also there are a few members there who live in Hamamet she could meet up with or help her if the shit does hit the fan.
Maybe your husband could suggest she join the group so that she has support??
It's called Tunisian's Wives & Girlfriends Safe Haven
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1425490644426222/?ref=group_browse_new
Thank you Big Bang Theory. I will pass it on to my husband x
 

Truthseeker

Member
Morning everyone, just a quick update. Still no concrete evidence on whether Jimmy is truly a rat, although everything points to that conclusion. My husband has spoken to his ex wife and she is insisting that he is genuine and that there is no need for concern. My husband has now withdrawn his permission for the children to travel. They both have parental rights and she needs his permission to be legally allowed to take them. Obviously she could go down a legal route, but this wouldn't be in time for them to travel this half term. Both my husband and I feel that it is all just too much of a gamble to take with the emotional well being of the children. They are potentially being introduced to someone with less than sincere motives, whether they would see it now or not, who knows, but we cannot give the meeting our blessing with so many questions of our own about this man. As I've said before, my husband (and I for that matter) are not bothered if she wants to chase a fantasy relationship, it is literally all about protecting the children.

I have no doubt that we have a very long road ahead of us! But we will continue to do our best to put the children's welfare first. Hopefully, one day, it will resolve itself, either with the proof of Jimmy's dishonesty or he will finally get his long awaited visa and the children can meet him in a more conventional environment rather than being flown to another country x
 
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