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cheri

Rat Expert
My English friend who has been living in Tunisia for about five years had a boyfriend, much younger than her. They separated for about a year and then she started seeing him again. Some months later she found out while they were apart he got a Tunisian girl pregnant and married her. He spends a lot of time with her and of course swears he still loves her and will divorce his wife when the child is older. They are often seen around together as a couple. She has been helping him with his rent and shopping etc during the recent lock-down months while he has been out of work. My question is simply is it usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship with another woman and does she accept it. He says she believes his mates are helping him out, but surely the wife cannot be that stupid.
 

JGG

Major Ratslayer
My English friend who has been living in Tunisia for about five years had a boyfriend, much younger than her. They separated for about a year and then she started seeing him again. Some months later she found out while they were apart he got a Tunisian girl pregnant and married her. He spends a lot of time with her and of course swears he still loves her and will divorce his wife when the child is older. They are often seen around together as a couple. She has been helping him with his rent and shopping etc during the recent lock-down months while he has been out of work. My question is simply is it usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship with another woman and does she accept it. He says she believes his mates are helping him out, but surely the wife cannot be that stupid.
I do not have a lot of expertise in this area but....from the information that I have gathered in this forum.....yes the fiance, wife, mother, sisters, family of rats are often in on this exploitation of foregners. They lie...turn a blind eye and can be very abusive. Your friend should be careful....these men can turn violent if they don't get what they want. Good luck and thanks for stopping by. ♡
 

Butterflies

Major Ratslayer
Hi Cheri welcome and the chance that the wife of the rat knows it is highly likely. As I read here at the forum they gossip much so your friend will be known to be with the rat and that he is married with a tunisian woman . They are taking advantage of your friend and are living of her expense.
 

Lass

Major Ratslayer
Yeah, unfortunately it is common and almost certainly the wife knows about it. It probably doesn't bother her either. As long as the rat brings dosh home it's all hunky-dory. I don't know where he is from but in the villages they know absolutely everything about each other. There is no secrets at all. We have that saying "They know you shat yourself before you even fart".
 

simple

Major Ratslayer
My English friend who has been living in Tunisia for about five years had a boyfriend, much younger than her. They separated for about a year and then she started seeing him again. Some months later she found out while they were apart he got a Tunisian girl pregnant and married her. He spends a lot of time with her and of course swears he still loves her and will divorce his wife when the child is older. They are often seen around together as a couple. She has been helping him with his rent and shopping etc during the recent lock-down months while he has been out of work. My question is simply is it usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship with another woman and does she accept it. He says she believes his mates are helping him out, but surely the wife cannot be that stupid.
Hi @cheri ..Correct me if im wrong ,,Wasnt your friend a member here before she moved to Tunisia ?I remember this username very well .She was intending to move to Hammamet ,very near me and to go into business ,a restaurant i believe...
 

Croydon girl

Major Ratslayer
My English friend who has been living in Tunisia for about five years had a boyfriend, much younger than her. They separated for about a year and then she started seeing him again. Some months later she found out while they were apart he got a Tunisian girl pregnant and married her. He spends a lot of time with her and of course swears he still loves her and will divorce his wife when the child is older. They are often seen around together as a couple. She has been helping him with his rent and shopping etc during the recent lock-down months while he has been out of work. My question is simply is it usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship with another woman and does she accept it. He says she believes his mates are helping him out, but surely the wife cannot be that stupid.
How has your friend managed to stay in Tunisia for 5 years? How does she support herself? Is she super rich?
 

Wiser

Major Ratslayer
:Cry: All the money your friend is giving him goes to his wife and daughter. All the people that tolerates him going out with your friend knowing he is married know it’s a bezness relationship.
Wives tolerate it because it’s seen as a job, they speak behind her back and most likely think she deserves to be financially exploited.
 
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Bubbly

Major Ratslayer
It reminded me of this video. For those who can speak french, they can have a look.

For the English speakers, it is about a Swiss woman who decided to leave everything behind to settle in Senegal. She met a local and younger man. He helped her build her house and they had a relationship but he warned her that he wanted a Senegalese wife.

A few years after, he married his younger wife, had children, they all live under her roof, eat the food they buy with her money. She also pays and help raise his kids...

He doesn’t work at all because his legs hurt. The second wife isn’t very grateful, she claims she can make enough money to support herself selling fruit juice at the market.

She is giving most of her money to his family hoping these people will take care of her when she will be sick and old.

 

cheri

Rat Expert
I remember this too - I hope she returns :love:

MH x
I remember this too - I hope she returns :love:

MH x
Hi Simple. No that was me. I moved to Tunisia 6 years ago, but was a member on TLR a year or so before that. We did get the restaurant bar but lost it after 2015 problems. I was in Yasmine Hammamet but now have a flat in Bareka. The friend I am talking about is English and lives in Tunisia part of the time, being medically retired.
 

Jane

Major Ratslayer
It reminded me of this video. For those who can speak french, they can have a look.

For the English speakers, it is about a Swiss woman who decided to leave everything behind to settle in Senegal. She met a local and younger man. He helped her build her house and they had a relationship but he warned her that he wanted a Senegalese wife.

A few years after, he married his younger wife, had children, they all live under her roof, eat the food they buy with her money. She also pays and help raise his kids...

He doesn’t work at all because his legs hurt. The second wife isn’t very grateful, she claims she can make enough money to support herself selling fruit juice at the market.

She is giving most of her money to his family hoping these people will take care of her when she will be sick and old.

I wish I could understand french, seems fascinating documentary . From what I can see though she seems happy and surrounded by kids ( surrogate granny) and part of a big family unit, maybe something she couldn’t have in her country ? Polygamy is accepted and works in some cultures.
 

simple

Major Ratslayer
Hi Simple. No that was me. I moved to Tunisia 6 years ago, but was a member on TLR a year or so before that. We did get the restaurant bar but lost it after 2015 problems. I was in Yasmine Hammamet but now have a flat in Bareka. The friend I am talking about is English and lives in Tunisia part of the time, being medically retired.
HI @cheri ,,good to hear from you again,,Yes i remember it was Yasmine ,Sorry the restaurant didnt work out ,Hope your keeping well,,,Your friend seems to be in a pickle,,,I would be surprised if this mans wife didnt know how he gets money .Its unusual if she didnt know .Most rat families contribute to scams and him taking money still from your friend ,isnt a good sign ..I hope she dosnt continue with him ,as they will expect her to carry on paying for everything ,even when the child is born .His wife must have been around while he was with your friend ,so she saw what he was up to ..Hammamet isnt that big a place and you can bump into someone 3 times a day ..And if she slept with him ,then im sure it woudlnt have been a one night stand ,You know the score out there,,
 

MH007

Administrator
Staff member
Hi Simple. No that was me. I moved to Tunisia 6 years ago, but was a member on TLR a year or so before that. We did get the restaurant bar but lost it after 2015 problems. I was in Yasmine Hammamet but now have a flat in Bareka. The friend I am talking about is English and lives in Tunisia part of the time, being medically retired.
So sorry it didn't work out for you Cheri - are you still with your Tunisian?

It's good to see you back again but wish it was a happy ending - I think most of us old timers on here really thought it would work out for you :Not Worthy:

MH x
 

Bubbly

Major Ratslayer
I wish I could understand french, seems fascinating documentary . From what I can see though she seems happy and surrounded by kids ( surrogate granny) and part of a big family unit, maybe something she couldn’t have in her country ? Polygamy is accepted and works in some cultures.
Well the second wife is very jealous so she won’t share the husband with her. She says they grew a bit distant and could only make love when the younger wife was outside. She is basically not allowed to share the bed.
The Swiss woman doesn’t like to share meals with them, she likes to eat in her room which is more quiet.
And she is paying for a good education for the kids and wants to make sure all the little girls go to school. On the other hand, the kids’ mother told the teachers it is ok to beat the kids if they don’t behave. The Swiss totally disagrees with that, obviously.
As for the husband when he is asked why his wife provides for him (which is very unlikely in their culture) he claims this is how it should be since he is too sick to do it himself.
It looks like everybody is respecting her since she has money/power. They consider her as a Senegalese and she wishes to be buried there, not in her country.

Nevertheless, in the comment section, people say they know her personally and the situation has evolved for the worst. Now she is supposedly much older and they are ignoring her. Donno if this is true though...
 

Amira

Major Ratslayer
My English friend who has been living in Tunisia for about five years had a boyfriend, much younger than her. They separated for about a year and then she started seeing him again. Some months later she found out while they were apart he got a Tunisian girl pregnant and married her. He spends a lot of time with her and of course swears he still loves her and will divorce his wife when the child is older. They are often seen around together as a couple. She has been helping him with his rent and shopping etc during the recent lock-down months while he has been out of work. My question is simply is it usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship with another woman and does she accept it. He says she believes his mates are helping him out, but surely the wife cannot be that stupid.
for God's sake do not believe in him. No, he won't leave his pregnant wife. I do not believe . He looks at the other woman as an income "maybe". He may not be looking for money but not believing in him.
 

Storm

Major Ratslayer
My English friend who has been living in Tunisia for about five years had a boyfriend, much younger than her. They separated for about a year and then she started seeing him again. Some months later she found out while they were apart he got a Tunisian girl pregnant and married her. He spends a lot of time with her and of course swears he still loves her and will divorce his wife when the child is older. They are often seen around together as a couple. She has been helping him with his rent and shopping etc during the recent lock-down months while he has been out of work. My question is simply is it usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship with another woman and does she accept it. He says she believes his mates are helping him out, but surely the wife cannot be that stupid.
For sure the wife is in on it. She doesn't care because she is reaping the rewards. They are exploiting your friend and he is giving your friend false hope so that she will continue to support them. So to answer your question yes! it is usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship(s) and accept it.
 

Plymouthgirl

Major Ratslayer
For sure the wife is in on it. She doesn't care because she is reaping the rewards. They are exploiting your friend and he is giving your friend false hope so that she will continue to support them. So to answer your question yes! it is usual for a Tunisian wife to know about her husband's relationship(s) and accept it.
The bit about him saying that his mates are helping him out isn’t true ............They (the wives) always know that it’s a European/other woman victim that’s doing it...............
 

Plymouthgirl

Major Ratslayer
The bit about him saying that his mates are helping him out isn’t true ............They (the wives) always know that it’s a European/other woman victim that’s doing it...............
And the funny thing is, if they do make a ‘loan’ from a friend, it’s just that, a ‘credit’ in French.............For some poxy amount that ALWAYS gets paid back, without fail!!!! Normally thanks to the unsuspecting victim..........Two-faced con-artists...........
 

Butterflies

Major Ratslayer
And the funny thing is, if they do make a ‘loan’ from a friend, it’s just that, a ‘credit’ in French.............For some poxy amount that ALWAYS gets paid back, without fail!!!! Normally thanks to the unsuspecting victim..........Two-faced con-artists...........
The last days my rat and I talked he wanted me to send money because he had no money for food :sneaky:. I told him ask a friend for food or money? He said ok I will ask a friend and pay the friend back when I send him money the next day. I didn't send nothing he can eat cobble stones for all I care :p
 
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