Discussion in 'Rat on a Rat' started by Fiercely Fi, Oct 13, 2018.
Wow ot sounds like you went through the ringer with this guy. How long were you together?
Just short of two years. I lived with the loony and his rat family....t'was quite an experience!
I laugh now....but at the time...I literally lived in a horror movie.
These blokes are nutters, Fiona.....they change by the minute....be grateful you got away from the corrupt copper as fast as you did
I still feel like Im going through hell. One minute I think I may have been wrong and he was just scared because of the baby and ive overreacted. But then I remember what I have read on here about the tell tale signs and recall that everything stated in that post he used on me. And I mean everything. I loved him I really did and all along he was using me.
What you are feeling now is totally normal. Many of us came here, read threads, recognised the same behaviours, then had a moment of guilt, rationalising their behaviour, wondering if we misjudged them, maybe they were different, but with time the reality hits. It’s normal to try and find some good in them, remembering some tender moments, but in truth they are amazingly good actors until the mask slips.
Laura is right, Fiona....your moments of doubt are normal.
When in doubt....just remember....he made you a criminal, he showed you the utmost disrespect....and he took your money.
Mine abused me in multiple ways, cheated on me, stole from me, hacked my accounts....threatened to kill my kids....and I STILL looked for excuses for him....I still believed he had a heart in there somewhere
When I look back at my old posts, I absolutely cringe....but I'm glad they are here, as those kinda posts highlight to people like you (new survivors)....that your recovery is textbook.
Yes and I would like to thank you all on this site for the help and support you have given me. Where I have not been able to speak to my family or even friends about this yet, due to the shame and embarrassment I have felt, I been able to speak with you ladies on this site. I will never forget what you all have done for me
They mess with your head. I had to see my rat today to arrange some things. And I found myself bing eating again. I have been very good since I cut him loose but without noticing it I did fall back in this bad habit. When he was here I was asking myself what I ever seen in him. He look scruffy not washed and shaved for a while. And off course there was one of his so called friends with him another scamming rat. That friend lived in Germany with a German wife he has got a daughter there. He took a big loan in Germany went to Tunis opened a coffee shop an took a Tunisian fake virgin wife.
I was in a living hell for a long time but somehow managed to compartmentalise my life with the rat. No one I work with knew a thing and I could function ‘normally’, but crumble and bawl like a banshee once I got in my car or got home. There is a degree of shame and humiliation which I minimised with friends, laughing it off, saying I put it down to experience. That will go eventually.
The shame is all theirs.
Was shooting at people?? Was this in the capital?
Yes at tunisians during the revolution in sousse, was the ' back streets' away from.tourists but only about a 10 minute walk to.the main tourist strip
....and they brag about how safe Tunisia is! If I had stayed 2 days longer, I would have been stuck there, as a terrorist attack left the airports closed down and there was an 8PM curfew! What horror!
My rat was always so insistent on me coming to his country for a visit, he would go on about how I'm missing out on such a beautiful place and that it's safe and blah blah blah...etc..so I would always argue about how unsafe it was and the terrorist attacks etc. Oh how he would get so offended about how negatively I would put his country down.
He would then say how I am racist and that if Tunisia was bad, then why are there so many tourists in their country every year? So i'm like it's because it's cheap to travel there not because it's safe. (Enter silent treatment for a week here)
And you are right.
People go there because it's cheap but eventaually they get scammed and they end up paying the holidays twice the real price.
As we all now know, they will lie about absolutely anything, everything, and swear on their Mothers lives that they are telling the truth! Tunisia is more dangerous now than when I was there which was November, 2015. Unemployment is rampant, costs of living has gone up, and the people are desperate. I never felt safe or secure there. I had to pull out my “street smarts” from living in USA big cities. I had a few little incidents like a man coming into the bathroom when I was in a disco on Djerba. He turned around and marched his sorry a** right out of there too. You have to always stay alert, be on guard, and be tough when the situation calls for it! Once was enough for me. I never went back. I made Abdelhak come to me the next 3 times (and I had to always pay 100% of everything....what great lives we gave those lowlives!!!) It was too third world and the garbage, beggars, wild animals, mosquitos, and lack of proper water pressure, toilet paper, etc. made it an unpleasant place to me.
There are travel agent prices and there are love rat prices! I could have stayed the entire time in the best resort on Djerba, all inclusive, and it would have cost me half of what that vulture lied and took off of me! Live and learn! Never again!
Christ, girl.....with the volume of cash he got from you in the form of gifts, visas, flights and general living expenses in both countries.....you could have probably bought the entire island!!
Imagine that,,,,all of us ladies taking over that entire island,,,without a rat in sight
It's a sure thing that would be the cleanest and happiest part of the country, were that to become a reality!
I fear we would be invaded though.....by visa hunting desperadoes
Lol.....He actually tried to talk me into buying one of those big hotels on a Djerba beach.....along with with a big house with inground pool for “US”! Talk about greedy! I sit back and laugh at him now! If he had not cheated and misbehaved, I shudder to think where I might be right now! Thank God, Rats can not keep up the imposter chameleon facade forever!!!!
In that case, I might consider going back!!
They would swim to us instead of taking the ferry or even worse....that dirty little 9 passengers bus!I am still traumatized! They can smell a visa like a vulture smells a dead carcass! Nasty creatures...those rats!
Your rat is so funny. May as well buy him his own island and make him king. He wanted it all
But at the same time, your rat is a dummy. He did all that just to end back in Tunisia with those flip flops. Pathetic.
In our final talk, I laughed at him and told him that I’ve NEVER met a bigger idiot in my entire life! I told him that he had seen a life which he never even knew existed, seemed thrilled by it, blew it all, and was back stuck where he came from! He claimed I could not control him! I told him that I agree, I can’t, but the Immigration/Customs in foreign airports could and if he wants to risk being arrested, by all means, go for it!!! Yes....in his disgusting flip flops and holey jeans! He claimed he can go to Algeria! I told him that yes, he probably can cause I did nothing stopping him within African countries, but go outside of Africa at his own risk! Then I hung up on him! He’s a monster pig, not only a disgusting rat! I have no idea what he’s up to anymore! He’s probably found himself some new victims, but hopefully, I saved them some money by blocking him from going to them on their money. If they go to him, I truly worry about their safety! I just hope they find this sight before going blindly into Tunisia!
How many times were his visa denied??? The more denials, the worse for them.
This is the problem with rats, they con but can't keep up the facade. So what is the point??
Your rat had the world handed to him on a platter, he was living the dream. Makes no sense. They really are brain dead zombies. Duh