Private Messages

Discussion in 'Site Related Discussion' started by Guess_Who, Apr 7, 2010.

  1. Guess_Who

    Guess_Who Made in England

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    Please can we keep anything that is said in a PM to anyone between the parties involved.

    Whilst I appreciate that some PM`s may be upsetting, we are all adults (I think!) and should deal with them appropriately or, report the content if we find it offensive.

    Privacy should be respected and I would hate to see the PM system removed.

    Moan over!!

    Thank You x
     
  2. paula01

    paula01 Well-Known Member

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    Yea why cant it be said so everyone can see????
     
  3. Burned-Once-Never-Again!

    Burned-Once-Never-Again! Member

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    I agree if somebody wants to be nasty and bitchy then they should be able to say it ifront of everybody (write it) not hide behind a PM.. But i think that PM is good though as there may be personal issues that people may wish to discuss and not display all over the site as people may misjudge ect and i may be very personal... But in that case i suppose there are other ways to contact xxxx
     
  4. Guess_Who

    Guess_Who Made in England

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    The logic is, that if something is said in private, then it should stay private.

    I can only reiterate that there are methods in place to report offensive or upsetting private messages, which will then be dealt with accordingly.
     
  5. Ben

    Ben Administrator

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    There is also Block. Do not see me, talk to me or even reply to my posts ;)
     
  6. Ladygaga

    Ladygaga Banned

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    Why are we even discussing it as it is not applicable to us members its the nutters that join , so we should really just disregard them
     
  7. Caramel

    Caramel Clairvoyante !!

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    They banned PMs on T.com and it is not working very well. Sometimes we have very personal issues that we dont want displayed in the posts, and it is necessary to contact someone privately. I certainly would not like the PM facility to be taken off.

    A prime example was the public row I had on T.com a few days ago regarding a crooked lawyer. If the PM facility was available, I would have contacted the person through that method. Again, in a way, going public worked for me on that occasion, because T.com members who saw the post before the words were deleted, would know the identity of this horrible lawyer and also the name he called English women. He actually said to my representative who had Power of Attorney - "Get out of my office - you English bitch". Hopefully, he will not get any more business from that source!
     
  8. alAzima

    alAzima Administrator & Voice of Reason Staff Member

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    There is no reason to remove the PM system, we are all adults and should be able to handle ourselves in a mature manner.

    Guess_who is correct that information shared via the PM system is NOT permitted to be posted onto the forums. If someone has confided in you via PM please respect their privacy and keep that information confidential.

    The PM system is necessary as we often have women come to this site who are hurt, scared, anxious, depressed, etc but fear putting anything into the public eye. They need to be able to contact someone on the forum or start a conversation and this is the best method for them; After all we are a SUPPORT site above all else.

    If someone has sent you a threatening or harassing PM, please forward it to myself or Ben and we will do the best that we can to resolve your issue with that person, speak with them, warn them, and at the end of the day if it's bad enough and does not stop, I'm sure Ben will ban them from the site.

    All of the back door gossip and bickering is NOT helping anyone. We're here to name rats and shame them in an effort to prevent any further victimization. We're here to help those that have been victimized by offering emotional support and education regarding their legal options. We're here to discuss all things Tunisian, relationships, culture, news, what have you.

    WE ARE NOT HERE to abuse and degrade one another.

    From this point forward those found abusing the PM system by posting information contained in a PM in the forum will be dealt with.

    Happy Posting.
     
  9. Ben

    Ben Administrator

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    and PMing :ben:
     
  10. alAzima

    alAzima Administrator & Voice of Reason Staff Member

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    Please don't stir the pot :D
     
  11. WouldI

    WouldI Guest

    He needs to go on the naughty step :ben::bonk:
     
  12. TunisiaMoon

    TunisiaMoon Guest


    ya better move up n make some room then :D
     
  13. Veritas

    Veritas The Contessa

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    I agree that personal info discussed/given on PM should under no circumstances be disclosed. Having said cowardly made threats should, in my humble opinion, be exposed. And as we're all adults, we should be able to take it on the chin; other than using such mechanisms to direct veiled threats.
     
  14. WouldI

    WouldI Guest

    I'm not sharing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :mad::ben:
     
  15. alAzima

    alAzima Administrator & Voice of Reason Staff Member

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    I agree that it's wrong to make threads via the PM system, however more can be accomplished if the person being threatened contacts myself or Ben. Throwing the PM into an open forum only invites more mudslinging. If you can forward it to myself, Ben, or one of the moderators perhaps we can get more accomplished to insure that the behavior does not continue.
     
  16. Ben

    Ben Administrator

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    Not me :dead:

    Don't PM me :dead: PM Azima :ben: :ben:

    or block block easy
     
  17. alAzima

    alAzima Administrator & Voice of Reason Staff Member

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    But I thought it was National Everyone Send Ben a PM week? :huh:
     
  18. Veritas

    Veritas The Contessa

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    Is that a suggestion/possibility or warning/threat?? :huh:

    In whichever case, I would assume that the people in charge; would be able to coherently & after taking all into consideration, would then make such a judgement.

    And not obviously after a single incident, as the one I'm assuming from which, you've decided to start this thread. Personally, I stand by what I said and do not regret a single word. It seems a bit random as so many other incidents have happened, some soo much worse and nothing like this was ever contemplated. I do hope TLR won't soon become T.COM-II. :dead:
     
  19. alAzima

    alAzima Administrator & Voice of Reason Staff Member

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    We are NOT going to remove the PM system. And we are NOT going to become T.com The Sequel! I promise because if that happens, I'm leaving too lol

    There have been several incidents this week regarding abuse of the PM system, so I'm not sure which one in particular you're referring to, but if everyone just sticks to the general rule of no posting PMs in the forum and respecting the privacy of information given to you in PM we'll all be OK!
     
  20. Burned-Once-Never-Again!

    Burned-Once-Never-Again! Member

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    I think in the majority the PM system is used for what it is ment to, i myslef have had some personal issuses and recently sent some PM's and there have stayed private and i apprecihate that the other person respected that but i think when it is a PM that conains bullying or threats then it should be made aware to all so that it can be dealt with and also the PM holds the proof.. Threats and abuse should always be taken serious!! But i think the PM system is there and doing what it should be by having the chance to talk about personal issues and talking in private to others ect xxx
     
  21. Veritas

    Veritas The Contessa

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    Ash I couldn't agree more. But if that 's the point take it up with the person who has done it. Don't start a generalised thread saying that might happen, I doesn't bide well - at least with me!
     
  22. Veritas

    Veritas The Contessa

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    I'm with you all the way. (f)(f)
     
  23. Ben

    Ben Administrator

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    :O:O:O !!!

    :mad: :mad: Wrong.

    t.com is an ambassador site :ben: (your words) TLR is the gardener :ben::ben: They will never be the same ! We have standards ya know :ben:

    PS. to everyone :

    1. No administrator or Moderator know who you are/ name / address etc.. if you hear different they are lying to you.

    2. No one is getting banned removed or whatever if you hear different then you've being lied to

    3. PM system, Gallery (as crappy as it is), and the chat aren't being disabled removed or suspended. not now not tomorrow again if you hear otherwise .... -_--_-

    4. If you didn't hear it from me or azima then it's not TLR's position ^_^

    I think Guess_who is just warning and she has a point. PM stays as Private and I want everyone to trust that it is and it is ;)
     
  24. alAzima

    alAzima Administrator & Voice of Reason Staff Member

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    That's not true, I'm watching you all as we speak :tongue: But the recent episodes of tribbing has me put off to watching any more :puke:
     
  25. Veritas

    Veritas The Contessa

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    :huh::innocent:(f)....( I like tribbing! :ben::ben:)
     

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