Spin off from Common rat Quotes (off topic posts)

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NetNiet

Guest
Hi....the brother has been left with brain damage and will never lead a normal life again. The operation he had done was done by a specialist but i did not cure him. My ex does work in a hotel and he earns 300td a month i think. he lives with another guy not far from the hotel. His parents dont work as they are old and they live/care for the brother.
The loan was from a friend of his. I have spoken to the friend who he owes the money to, and i was asking him a lot of questions. He told he a lot about himself and where he lived and the loan and that my ex had paid back £1000 .He also told me he wanted they money back as he wanted to buy some olive trees and he was putting pressure on my ex for the money.
My ex has told me that we can not be together because he can not love or have feelings for while he has this debt. He said "What has he got to offer me".
He is on anti depressants and i have been to his apartment and seen them. He always seems angry with everything.....which is why i think hes telling the truth....but it seems so far fetched.
And with everything you read its classic rat signs.....but what if it is true and im calling him everything.
Hi Twitter,
May I ask you if we already did write about this in the past at Tunisia.com?
Because it sounds really very familiar to me!

OK again, I don't know you and I don't know your ex or the person who he did get a loan from.
I only can give you my opinion based on my experience here talking with persons.

First off all, I don't trust for 100% that friend which you spook to and what he told.
Why I don't believe it?
Because I see them here passing the telephones to friends and family to let an other person make confirmation about something.

Once there were a lot off friends and family here, we're having a BBQ and one off them spook with his European girlfriend and I heard him saying that he will pass his telephone to me. I didn't know that woman and I don't want to speak to her and than he asked me if I could confirm something, which I knew wasn't true. I asked him, before speaking to her, are you sure you want me to speak to her??? And a lot off them here told NOOOOO you don't want to, but he did wanted it, so I took the phone and told her the truth!
And than you have to imagine that they're not used to things like this, they are used that persons will support them in what they're saying! So what I did, was so not done for here! LOL


So to me what the friend told you have no value for guarantee.
And I don't know in which place he's living, but if it's in the South, I don't think he wants to buy now olive trees, because last saison.....well there was no season....no olives at all because off no rain.

And because he's talking about a lot off money, it will not surprise me if the " friend from the loan" will get money aswell if they are succesfull by getting the money from you!

And yes offcourse when there is a money problem, it gives pressure in a relationship, doesn't matter which nationality!!!
But to continue to blackmail you by saying that the money issue, there is no room for love?
I think that's very far fetched!
If so, then the world would be very little room for love, don't you think?

If your ex earns 300 per month, it's impossible that he's done and doing what he did say!
And pay back the loan 1500 pounds and paying the household for everyone in his family and than also paying for the rent from his own appartment.....IMPOSSIBLE!!!
For me that's the proof that he's not telling the truth.

You write:
He always seems angry with everything.....which is why i think hes telling the truth....but it seems so far fetched.
Can it be that he's angry with you that you don't give him the money?
Or he's angry with himself because he thinks what else can I do to get the money from her?

Being angry is not proof that he's telling the truth! There are lotts off reasons why he can be angry!
I don't only understand what you're still doing with a person who is allways angry and I think you deep down in your heart know it's not true.....?

And say that he's true!
Don't you think you earn much more be respected?????
Why do you accept to stay in contact with a person who is angry, allways talking about money he wants from you which he knows you don't have?
When did he asked how it was with you, is he interested in you as a person, how you're feeling, about what you're doing? Is he asking how it is at your work, how it is with your friends and family????
 
T

twitter

Guest
Hi Twitter,
May I ask you if we already did write about this in the past at Tunisia.com?
Because it sounds really very familiar to me!

OK again, I don't know you and I don't know your ex or the person who he did get a loan from.
I only can give you my opinion based on my experience here talking with persons.

First off all, I don't trust for 100% that friend which you spook to and what he told.
Why I don't believe it?
Because I see them here passing the telephones to friends and family to let an other person make confirmation about something.

Once there were a lot off friends and family here, we're having a BBQ and one off them spook with his European girlfriend and I heard him saying that he will pass his telephone to me. I didn't know that woman and I don't want to speak to her and than he asked me if I could confirm something, which I knew wasn't true. I asked him, before speaking to her, are you sure you want me to speak to her??? And a lot off them here told NOOOOO you don't want to, but he did wanted it, so I took the phone and told her the truth!
And than you have to imagine that they're not used to things like this, they are used that persons will support them in what they're saying! So what I did, was so not done for here! LOL


So to me what the friend told you have no value for guarantee.
And I don't know in which place he's living, but if it's in the South, I don't think he wants to buy now olive trees, because last saison.....well there was no season....no olives at all because off no rain.

And because he's talking about a lot off money, it will not surprise me if the " friend from the loan" will get money aswell if they are succesfull by getting the money from you!

And yes offcourse when there is a money problem, it gives pressure in a relationship, doesn't matter which nationality!!!
But to continue to blackmail you by saying that the money issue, there is no room for love?
I think that's very far fetched!
If so, then the world would be very little room for love, don't you think?

If your ex earns 300 per month, it's impossible that he's done and doing what he did say!
And pay back the loan 1500 pounds and paying the household for everyone in his family and than also paying for the rent from his own appartment.....IMPOSSIBLE!!!
For me that's the proof that he's not telling the truth.

You write:

Can it be that he's angry with you that you don't give him the money?
Or he's angry with himself because he thinks what else can I do to get the money from her?

Being angry is not proof that he's telling the truth! There are lotts off reasons why he can be angry!
I don't only understand what you're still doing with a person who is allways angry and I think you deep down in your heart know it's not true.....?

And say that he's true!
Don't you think you earn much more be respected?????
Why do you accept to stay in contact with a person who is angry, allways talking about money he wants from you which he knows you don't have?
When did he asked how it was with you, is he interested in you as a person, how you're feeling, about what you're doing? Is he asking how it is at your work, how it is with your friends and family????
I agree with everything you are saying......really i do. I think its just because i like/want to see the best in people, probably why i always get walked all over.He does ask how i am and my family. but now he doesn't reply if i send him a message.....i know i need to leave him to it.
 
M

marilyna

Guest
Twitter, the not replying is one of their tactics to make you feel bad, guilty, and then maybe just send the money.
 
N

NetNiet

Guest
I think its just because i like/want to see the best in people, probably why i always get walked all over.
There are here so many nice, friendly, good and respected Tunisian people living, come here and meet them and they will not walking over you, because as you respect them, than they respect you!

But don't stick to persons who wants you to give money to them and promise than they have place in their hearts and minds to love you!

And think about the whole story again what happened and than think this man was your neighbour and is now your ex, what will you do, will you try to avoid him? Or will you go 3 times a week to his house for a cup off coffee and than have the same conversations which you have now, and again and again, will you still keep on going to have fun and drink a coffee and talk with your neighbour alias ex boyfriend?
 
M

Madame2010

Guest
I agree with everything you are saying......really i do. I think its just because i like/want to see the best in people, probably why i always get walked all over.He does ask how i am and my family. but now he doesn't reply if i send him a message.....i know i need to leave him to it.
...and that my lovely is what makes us the perfect targets and they know it.
TC asked about me and my family, my son, my mum - all of them. It never meant he cared because I know now he didn't. They say and do anything.
Huge hugs
Mx
 
C

Caramel

Guest
So what if it is true? To be brutally honest what does it matter that every last thing he's said is true? Are you supposed to solve all of his problems and meet his financial obligations for him? We all go through hard times and face very challenging situations ( injuries or deaths of loved ones, loss of job, loss of home, depression, etc) But we don't all turn to someone we've very recently met and expect them to help us meet our financial obligations.

I know I sound like a hard ass, but I can't help it. He's playing on your sympathies and to an extent it seems to be working. I'm sorry his brother had an accident, I'm sorry that he's the only one in his family working, I'm sorry that he owes a large amount of money to his friend, I'm sorry that he's on anti depressants, BUT if he can not love or have feelings while under debt, why did he bother with you in the first place?

Right there is the TRUE reason behind his actions. " I can not love or have feelings while I am under this debt and I don't have anything to offer you" But the real reason I'm with you is because of what I think YOU have to offer me.

Buy my love, buy me.
Well said - totally agree with every word. Twitter, you really know in your heart that what AlAzima and others have said on here is true but being the kind and thoughtful soul you are, you are still looking for excuses and blaming yourself for not helping him financially.

Have you actually seen his brother in the hospital? Sorry for being suspicious but it all seems very strange, and incidentally, the person who he allegedly owes money to may be in on the scam. Just a thought to bear in mind.

Ask yourself why he is pressurising you and expecting you to pick up his financial tab? It is not your responsiblity just as your bills are not his. You are not even married to this guy, so why the guilt trip? I really wish you can sort your feelings out over this situation. (f)(f)
 
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