What was your "weakness" when you were hooked by a rat?

Discussion in 'Rat Behavior' started by Myriam, Feb 11, 2018.

  1. Brasilgirl

    Brasilgirl Well-Known Member

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    You should make your friends list on facebook private and set him as a restricted account in your security. A restricted account can only see what you have made public on your Facebook. He won’t know you did it, he won’t get notified. He just won’t see anything unless you tag him or make it public.
     
  2. beznessbitch

    beznessbitch Well-Known Member

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    yep that's exactly what the rats do to their victims - mine did anyway - I could see some things but not everything - alarm bells
     
  3. Brasilgirl

    Brasilgirl Well-Known Member

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    Mine did it to me too. I noticed when he liked and commented some things I should have seen on my feed. So I did some googling and figured it out. I did it back to him after we broke up. Then I temporarily deactivated my account. I didn’t want him seeing anything if I reactivated later on.
     
  4. beznessbitch

    beznessbitch Well-Known Member

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    I made another account and found about 10 other accounts belonging to him - I was blocked in my real facebook account! bloody cheek of it - blocking his cash cow!! it was the beginning of a long end but eventually I got to the end - I also deleted the facebook - more out of embarrassment I had made a complete fool of myself :(
     
  5. Brasilgirl

    Brasilgirl Well-Known Member

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    One time my rat Unfriended me. He was upset about something I did. So I just thought what ever, he had me restricted anyway. No loss there. Then later on he asked me why I never said happy birthday to him on Facebook. I told him I couldn’t see it. Then quite a while later, probably after he filtered out his other victims, he made the posts so I could see them. But he never added me as a friend. Highly suspicious!
    I’ll love you forever. (But I won’t make you my friend)
    Eventually he added me, and for a brief time I could see everything. I got in there and creeped my ass off. Mostly just got confirmations. But some new juicy bits were open. Then he shut me down again.
     
  6. Mango Chutney

    Mango Chutney Well-Known Member

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    I'm so proud of you!!!!!! :D:D
    And you say you aspire to be like me and Heidi! Girlfriend.....you already freakin there!! :D
     
  7. Brasilgirl

    Brasilgirl Well-Known Member

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    Wow! Thank you!
    I could still use practice. I’m not quite as nimble on the keyboard as you two are. :D
     
  8. Mango Chutney

    Mango Chutney Well-Known Member

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    Trust me....I'm still years behind Heidi...but she's teaching me well :D
     
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  9. AmberHeart

    AmberHeart Lady Amberheart of Gafsa

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    My rat did the same to the ex victim, me and current victim, he defriended us for periods and then add again. But he leaves for public to see he is adding more women. And he removes his status from engaged or in a relationship to single. Once the victim starts to believe him again he replaces single to empty status.
     
  10. Mango Chutney

    Mango Chutney Well-Known Member

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    Nasty bastards, aren't they....to play with our heads this way :Evil: Mine did it too.
     
  11. beznessbitch

    beznessbitch Well-Known Member

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    they must have a rat school on how to play us. very hard lessons to learn but it really would never happen to me again im single forever now.. cant trust anyone
     
  12. beznessbitch

    beznessbitch Well-Known Member

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    but i do know if anyone took my fags away i would have gone berserk!!! that really would have pushed me over the so i take my hat off to willow!!!
     
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  13. Farango

    Farango Member

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    So I told my rat in the early hours of this morning after a 2 hours video call that we should call it a day. I've said it nicely because I don't want any trouble and then he just text asking "how are you today? " . Funny how it's always a very standard text and he has never once used my name !! Too many to keep up with so this helps him avoid any mistakes . I've not opened it.
     
  14. Farango

    Farango Member

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    Don't stay single forever, you are depriving a good guy your company !!
     
  15. Brasilgirl

    Brasilgirl Well-Known Member

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    That’s what they do on the coffee shops.
     
  16. Farango

    Farango Member

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    Phoned again !! I answered and he said ... wait for originality. .. "there is no one else but you, will you come to Tunisia, I like you, you drive me crazy not wanting to speak to me, etc." I'm trying to do this as politely as possible because he's not actually done anything massively wrong at the minute and I don't want to be upsetting a rat...
     
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  17. AmberHeart

    AmberHeart Lady Amberheart of Gafsa

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    he has nothing to black mail you with, so dont be scared. the longer you stay and the longer you listen the more chance for him to hold on to you. telling from experience, tryied to escape from my rat a few times and always ended back to his lies and cheat.
     
  18. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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  19. juicyfruit

    juicyfruit Well-Known Member

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  20. Eelleennaa

    Eelleennaa Well-Known Member

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    Can I ask how you managed to stay strong and leave for good the last time?
     
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  21. see clearly

    see clearly Well-Known Member

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    Yes i recall the days i was stuck indoors most of the holiday. He would disappear all day then return saying he was tired and didn't want to makelove and just sleep. Even then it was rubbish beyond rubbish. Not even sex in the morning ( i think i had it twice and quicky in2 weeks i was h after just rush out of the apartment. He made my self esteem every low. It took ages and still does not to pull my looks together. I am pretty although everyone says so but i always think they are just trying to make me feel better. Some days i feel attractive alot i do not and it impacts on everything . Im not ugly by any stretch but aware now of those who say im attractive girls as well as me. Im not bi but ive nothing against it. These guys really rip your heart and soul to pieces not to mention your bank balance as they made me feel id travel to the ends of the earth to be with him. Last tie i do that lool. Im struggling financially not to mention ill health which work are disciplining me for and some trumped up charges that i am racist. Total lies. I hope to blame it on the build up leading to my collapse and potassium levels being too low which can make you a bit crazy, and they can and do make you loose all self-restraint. God knows the damage the drugs he gave me secretly as well as overtly. Drugs are are a powerful weapon in rattery. Not to mention the battering we have taken to self esteem and total reliance ( inmy case anyway ) that we are in a foreign country and we know their ways we dont. Big hugs and hope you never get caught up in this. Its hard but gets easier. Ive seen other men since and alhough awkward it did help ,but be careful there too. Trust me your antenna will be twitching if its a rat. Dont ignore it Big Hugs xxx ps i only went to shut those idiots at work who taunted me for never going anywhere for or not having a boyfriend. Kinda killed one bird with one stone. I should have ignored them its my life not theres and what are matters. Most collegues have two incomes, i dont and have to find everything out of that including debt. I also had to pay for several operations that NHS in their incompetence and refused to help failed to deal with and/or made more of a mess than when i started. I cant even sue as classes as a complication and i dont need a load of fees over and above rat debt.xxxx
    xxxx
     
  22. Heidi

    Heidi The Sleuth

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    How can you be a racist when you were in love with a Tunisian Love Rat ;)

    Tell them you are a lesbian. That should shut them up :coffee:
     
  23. Judithlyn

    Judithlyn Well-Known Member

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    You didn’t ask me but I would like to reply! I was so caught up in this forever love! I was absolutely devastated last October when I found out about the real Abdelhak! It took me months to get out of the depression, the agony, and to stop dwelling on him 24/7. I kept reading on here for hours. The stories of others helped me greatly! I slowly started losing my love for him! I went through all of the stages of grief. I called him every name in the book. I screamed, yelled, cried, and threatened him! In all fairness, I will say that he never said one unkind word to me! He tried to win me back over and over. He begged me to come back to see him, again I am welcome to stay in his parents house! I kept reading on here. Slowly, I got stronger! Finally, I wrote him a nice but strong letter that we are finished forever. I thanked him for many great memories, wished him well, and told him that it is time to move forward alone! He replied very nicely. I wrote once more telling him exactly why we were finished, he cheated, he used another woman along with used me, lied even when caught red handed, and I will never live that way! That was it! I heard zero for 2 weeks but then he wrote again. Short little messages, “I will only love you forever....blah blah blah!” I sometimes reply, “thank you!” Sometimes I ignore. That’s where things stand now! I’m scared of him. He’s a psychopath! I will never go to Tunisia again! I have done nothing for him since he left my house on May 29, 2017. His other victim died that day. He’s lost both of us. Once he said to me all pitiful that he has no woman in his life! Does he really expect sympathy from me? They are morons! Hold your head up high, take it one day at a time, keep reading on here, and be thankful you are a survivor! Some women were not so fortunate....there have been murders and suicides amongst women of rats! It’s hell recovering from these monsters! Best wishes! Hugs! Keep reading on here!
     
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  24. see clearly

    see clearly Well-Known Member

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    ha ha thats a good one. I havnt worked out if im racist towards him or the asians. Cat fur is gonna fly thats for sure. I think this guy is white, yet complaining about the asians at the halal abattoir - yet im the one who is pulled up about an alleged racist remark! doesnt make sense! You should have seen the racist crap he was coming out with !!! as hole. But council being council, they take it ever so seriously. Never mind me and nearly having a nervous breakdown. i think the best tactic is i have amnesia from being unconscious for a day or so and likley permanent so cant recall any of it.
     
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  25. see clearly

    see clearly Well-Known Member

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    God for you - best decision you will ever make coming from somene mentally mesed upand severly in debt thant ihat i havnt got. TLR keeps you strong and supports you when your weak and for free. It is a god send. Stick with us im 18 months down the line and i feel virtually nothing for my rat. I shall re name him the man. There are much better people out there. Its not a cliche its true. i had a few dips in the water so to speak felt guilty but it was necessary to see other men within reason and vet them. Any antenee twitching forget it. Im actually seing casually an asian bloke more regional than i am in accent. I tend to drift and he chases me and its not stalker type chasing just asks if im ok. Obviouly im warey and my heart is guarded. Give it time. Being with someone isnt evrything lots of love and support sending to you my sweet. You have us, we are much better and much more honerable. Cut ties give yourself time to heal take up a hobby that involves mixing with people if you can face it. Your friend and supporter xxx
     

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